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How to get rid of the fear of pain before childbirth. Other fears of pregnant women. When you need help from a psychologist or doctor

Relaxation and tranquility by the end of the third trimester are replaced by growing excitement. There are more and more reasons for worry, friends on the forum are generating new ideas, and the level of fear is developing into panic. To calm down before childbirth, the condition must be controlled by the woman to avoid mental disorders or through therapeutic and drug measures.

Alarm bells that awaken the mother from a state of harmony appear after the first screening. During the ultrasound, the doctor tells you what the baby looks like, how it is positioned, whether it calmly allows itself to be examined or is hiding. There is a feeling of personality, the responsibility for whose life lies with the mother. If you do not control the oncoming excitement, the sensations will grow into fears, then into phobias. Cases of serious mental disorders against this background have been established (usually after 36 weeks of pregnancy).

Reason for fear:

  1. pain;
  2. death;
  3. complications during childbirth;
  4. diseases;
  5. loss of attractiveness;
  6. decrease in social status;
    Ø Responsibility for human life;
    Ø Skip the onset of labor.

In half the cases, the cause of panic before childbirth is the unknown pain that friends talk about so much. But the individual physiological threshold of tolerance will always be higher than painful sensations. This is how nature intended it. Sometimes, if you don’t give in to panic, you even get by without screaming. In a state of fear, the hormone adrenaline is produced, which stimulates the transmission of pain impulses to the brain. The less adrenaline, the calmer the nervous system reacts.

The probability of infant mortality in a successful pregnancy is 1/1000. And those rare cases are associated with poor quality medical care. Therefore, the fear of death in childbirth is unjustified; the level of qualifications of modern doctors inspires confidence.

Every third pregnant woman speaks about the fear of losing attractiveness. But the shape returns within 6-12 months, with proper nutrition and exercise.

Women who led a business lifestyle, were engaged in a career, and professional development are worried about the loss of social status. A fear develops that the employee will no longer be in demand and useful. Such phobias become more complicated after childbirth and often turn into deep depression. Need help from a psychologist.

Parents who were disliked in childhood project a picture for their offspring. They exaggerate the scale of their importance and reduce the level of independence in future children. They will teach you how to manage your fear of responsibility in preparatory courses for parents. Trainings help calm yourself before childbirth and control fear. Recommended from the 22nd week of pregnancy, it is better to visit both parents.

Women who are afraid of not being able to get to the hospital in time do so in vain. Since even a quick birth lasts from one and a half hours. There is enough time for transportation, especially since a pregnant woman has the right to call an escort car with a sound signal.

Ways to calm down before childbirth

To combat fear and panic before childbirth, you need to accept the problem and start working on it. Under the influence of hormones, a woman loses the objectivity of her self-esteem, so her family should help. If a mother often talks about her fear of childbirth, she has a blush on her cheeks, her eyes sparkle, and panic attacks are likely.

How to calm yourself before childbirth and not panic:

  • include bananas, chocolate, oatmeal in the menu;
  • read novels;
  • do handicrafts;
  • go to the theater, opera;
  • do yoga;
  • take baths with lavender every evening (7-8 drops);
  • learn breathing exercises (diaphragm);
  • walk 2 times a day for 1 hour;
  • perform Kegel exercises (in the absence of contraindications);
  • use herbal antidepressants.

NovoPassit is a safe sedative before childbirth, recommended to be taken during the 9th month of pregnancy. The drug is available in the form of tablets, capsules, solution, syrup, the cost is 450-500 rubles per package.

A sedative during childbirth that will reduce the pain of spasms is an infusion of lemon balm. The leaves of the plant are brewed with boiling water and infused for 30 minutes; the properties last for a day. For prevention, drink 500 ml per day for a week (starting from 36). By the time of contractions, the nervous and psychological background has stabilized.

A woman needs to imagine a positive outcome of events in her head every day. Visualize the situation when the baby is in your arms, how discharge from the maternity hospital proceeds.

Those around you should not overdo it with care, since the emotional background of a pregnant woman is weak. Focusing on the problem and frequently discussing fears will lead to a worsening of the condition - tears, ostentatious depression, manipulation.

Thomas Trobe's books help to cope with panic fear of childbirth. The publications teach us to perceive and get rid of fear as an essence. After reading, the negativity goes away, confidence in oneself, in the future, and in the successful resolution of pregnancy appears.

It is necessary to limit the communication of the expectant mother on thematic sites where women with similar ideas discuss their phobias. There is no advice on the forum, but the panic syndrome will intensify.

Anxiety before meeting the baby is a normal state for a pregnant woman. In 20% of women, the fear syndrome is complicated to the point of phobia. Therefore, the spouse and relatives should pay close attention to the mother’s behavior and not attribute anxiety to hormonal fluctuations.

Methods for eliminating problems during childbirth

Often a woman, calm and confident during pregnancy, experiences the first fear when her water breaks. While waiting for contractions, anxiety increases, the mother loses self-control and does not understand what to do if she panics before childbirth. Tea with lemon balm during uterine contractions will relax the muscles and calm the nervous system.

How not to panic during childbirth:

  1. invite your spouse and mother in advance;
  2. perform breathing exercises;
  3. rest between contractions;
  4. follow the obstetrician's recommendations;
  5. visualize the result;
  6. drink less water.

For patients who are terrified of giving birth, partner birth is recommended. It is allowed to invite any accompanying person - mother, husband, girlfriend. You need to write an application in advance addressed to the head physician of the hospital and sign it with the head of the department. Close to a loved one, contractions will be easier, physical and moral assistance will be provided.

Breathing exercises dilate blood vessels, stimulate the flow of oxygen to tissues, making pain easier to bear. You need to inhale deeply through your nose, draw in your stomach, hold for 2 seconds, then slowly exhale through your mouth in “floors”, relaxing your abs.

You should not lie down between contractions, as this will cause the first stage of labor to last longer. Calm walking, stroking the abdomen, and even breathing will help you recover and gain strength for the next contraction.

Psychologists recommend talking to the child while he is striving outside. Encourage, praise, promise to see you soon. Imagine how he will be held in your arms and pressed against your chest for the first time.
Pressure on the uterus should be reduced to a minimum, so water consumption at the onset of contractions is limited. Otherwise, a full bladder will create discomfort.

Panic during childbirth is common. It manifests itself, in addition to fear, as a feeling of hopelessness, despair, and anger. The woman screams, does not listen to the medical staff, and requires anesthesia. This behavior is the main danger to the fetus.

Postpartum depression

Depending on the physical condition and integrity of the birth canal, the woman’s body recovers in 2-6 months. After six months, the menstrual cycle and hormonal levels improve, and it seems that life is moving into a stable direction. But, according to statistics, out of 100 young mothers, 90 become depressed. Common causes are lack of sleep, excess weight, and physical activity.

You can’t do this without the help of your spouse and close relatives. A woman needs free time. It has been proven that 2 hours spent on yourself is enough for a mother to have a positive attitude. The available minutes can be spent on sleep, sports, a beauty salon, or meeting with friends.

  1. taking vitamin complexes;
  2. food – vegetables, fruits, protein;
  3. yoga, gymnastics classes;
  4. sleep 8 hours a day;
  5. help with cleaning the house and cooking (mother, sister);
  6. adjusting to the baby’s sleep-wake schedule;
  7. leave time for romantic relationships with your spouse (at least once a week).

The development of depression is stimulated by a reaction to the reflection in the mirror, with which the young mother is not satisfied. In the first 2 months, the changes are temporary, the weight will return to normal (if you do not overeat), the stomach will retract. Gymnastics, separate meals and vitamins are the correct postpartum regimen.

But there are situations when depression turns into a mental disorder. It often occurs in mothers without the support of loved ones, 5-6 months after childbirth. If a woman has stopped smiling, cries often, lashes out at others, and eats little (or, on the contrary, overeats), she needs the help of a psychotherapist.

  • therapy through consciousness;
  • hypnosis.

The method of working with consciousness is to identify fears. Memories from childhood, youth, relationships with parents, connections with a spouse are awakened. After 3-4 sessions, the doctor works to displace the “memory of the past” from consciousness. During treatment, isolation of the patient is not recommended; contact with the baby will improve the condition. For recovery, 10-16 sessions are enough, depending on the complexity of the situation.

Hypnosis therapy also erases the source of negativity from consciousness, but without the participation of the patient. The doctor finds the reason and programs for re-evaluation. The course consists of 8-10 sessions.

In both cases, after classes you need to visualize a picture of a happy future, in which the child should appear as the main reason for happiness. The development of the baby is projected - kindergarten, school, college, wedding. This way, attention will shift from your own person to the well-being of the child.
Every fear has a physiological basis. The production of adrenaline enhances the nervous system's response to the irritated tissue. But if self-control is achieved, childbirth will be quick and easy. To help women - breathing techniques, yoga, preparatory courses.

Pregnancy is the most long-awaited and amazing period in the life of any woman. Approaching the moment of the birth of the baby, the feeling of excitement in the pregnant woman increases. Thoughts about childbirth are common to expectant mothers while they are waiting. They are often of a negative nature due to the woman’s fears when she approaches an important date. To ensure a fear-free pregnancy, you need to prepare properly. With some effort, you will stop wondering how to overcome your fear of childbirth.

Tokophobia (fear of childbirth in a pregnant woman) is one of the types of phobias, which consists of inexplicable anxiety, fear of childbirth and changes in connection with the birth of a child.

Every woman experiences fear of childbirth. This is a normal reaction of any pregnant woman, regardless of whether it is the first birth or a repeat birth. But due to the appearance of tokophobia, a real phobia, a woman can refuse motherhood, provoke an abortion, have difficulty conceiving, or attempt suicide.

Tokophobia can be primary or secondary. Primary appears in women who have not previously given birth. Fear can arise due to negative ideas formed in childhood and adolescence, sexual abuse, physical harm, improper upbringing, poor economic conditions and other reasons.

Secondary tokophobia is characteristic of women who have had childbirth experience. In this case, the difficulties they have gone through, rumors about repeated births, age and other factors can shape women's fears.

In addition to the swarm of thoughts that plague the expectant mother, tokophobia manifests itself as nightmares, anxiety, panic, depression, aggression, loss of strength, excessive sweating, nausea, vomiting, dizziness, and loss of consciousness.

Why do pregnant women have fears on the eve of childbirth?

Before thinking about how to overcome the fear of pregnancy and childbirth, it is worth understanding the reasons for its occurrence. Fear of childbirth occurs due to:

  • release of hormones;
  • physiological changes occurring over 9 months;
  • stories about the births of other women, told in real life or on the Internet;
  • lack of knowledge;
  • lack of consultation with an experienced, reputable specialist;
  • previous bad birth experience;
  • negative experiences of going to hospitals;
  • sexual traumas suffered;
  • insufficient material security;
  • environment;
  • psychological immaturity during early pregnancy;
  • physical injuries and illnesses;
  • accidental pregnancy;
  • absence of a man nearby.

According to psychologists, the primary causes of prenatal fears are in the early period of a woman’s development. Often, being a girl or a child, she perceives information from the outside about childbirth and the birth of a child - sources say that this is a danger that promises numerous problems. these thoughts arise and form entire groups of phobias that she will have to overcome, because this is important for her and the unborn child.

What fears do expectant mothers have?

Depending on a woman’s physiological characteristics, upbringing, cultural content, environment, position in society, level of income and other factors, she develops a number of fears before childbirth. The main ones include:

  • fear of pain;
  • fear of being late to the hospital;
  • fear of premature birth and bad doctors;
  • fear of the possibility of a cesarean section and the procedure itself;
  • if involuntary bowel movement occurs;
  • fear of remaining helpless, losing control over the situation;
  • fear of spoiling your appearance;
  • how will I work later?
  • how will I manage everything;
  • fear of responsibility;
  • fear of losing oneself;
  • if I can't cope with childcare;
  • if postnatal damage to the child occurs;
  • suddenly labor doesn’t start at all;
  • if I'm a bad mom;
  • suddenly my husband stops loving me;
  • fear of major life changes;
  • phobias of postpartum complications;
  • fear of death, etc.

How to overcome tokophobia?

In nature, everything is planned wisely; such a complex process has its own “natural” pain relief. At the moment of the end of labor, a large dose of joy hormones - oxytocin and serotonin - is released into the blood of the woman in labor. For this reason, after the entire process, a woman’s memory does not remain a feeling of pain or memories of the torment she endured.

Here are tips on how to overcome your fear of childbirth.

Study the issue - read literature about childbirth, the Internet and the availability of various printed literature will help you become fully familiar with the topic of childbirth and thoroughly prepare for upcoming events.

Contact specialists for advice. They will answer any fears in detail and advise ways to overcome them. For example, you can contact a psychologist-hypnologist Baturin Nikita Valerievich, which will help you get rid of tokophobia.

A good solution would be courses for expectant mothers. You will be able to gain practical skills and communicate with women who have faced similar problems.

Take meditation courses. They will help you overcome the fear of childbirth, relax, and find harmony. Meditation can be done at home.

Don't listen to scary stories. Especially often, horror stories can be heard from women who have little understanding of the issue, but love to talk, or from those who, unfortunately, were unlucky with childbirth. Don't be too impressionable. You have time, use it to your advantage and can properly prepare for the process.

Don't keep your fears of childbirth to yourself. They arise in a matter that is little known to us. Do not pretend that you are not afraid of anything, it is better to expose your fears and work through each one. Be prepared for the upcoming event.

Don't be afraid of postpartum "disfigurement." There are many exercises that will help you quickly put your body in order and restore the elasticity of your skin and muscles. The beauty industry has created a variety of products to create an ideal figure. Look at the stars of show business, many gave birth, but were able to recover.

Don't be afraid to be late. Contractions are a precursor to labor and usually last from several hours to a day. During this time, you will have time to get to the maternity ward from anywhere.

Don't be afraid of maternity leave. The birth of a child is the most beautiful stage in the life of every woman. The development of a child will be very exciting for the first 1.5 years of life, and then you can find ways to properly organize your time, devote the free minutes and hours to your own development, if you wish, you can do work at home, complete training courses, get additional education or improve your qualifications.

Cheer yourself up. Having more confidence won't hurt you. A person is always able to cope with the circumstances that overtake him. Prepare, concentrate - everything will work out.

Do something that excites you. Any pleasant hobbies will help you distract yourself and calm your nerves.

Do exercises for pregnant women - it should be done a little every day.

Having followed all the tips listed above, you will stop wondering how to overcome the fear of childbirth. You will be able to fully welcome the happiest moment of your life.

What do psychologists say about what the fear of childbirth is and how to overcome it?

Like a natural life process. Do not perceive your situation and the upcoming birth as a feat, this is a natural process that billions of women have overcome. And don't take it as something negative. Nature has taken care of everything; at the end of childbirth, you will experience a feeling of immense joy from the release of a large dose of happiness hormones.

Career women should look at the process of pregnancy and childbirth as work that needs to be done. In this case, the woman works on self-control, because her condition affects not only her, but also the child.

Those who tend to think in terms of overcoming challenges and improving themselves, consider that pregnancy and childbirth are just that. At the end, you will not only receive a prize, but you will also surpass yourself, be able to develop and become something greater than yourself.

Collective activities and communication with similar pregnant women in a limited dose will help you understand how to cope with the fear of childbirth. Realizing that there is someone with similar problems, it is easier for a pregnant woman to understand herself and cope with her condition.

An experienced specialist will help to cope with the problem, but the key role is played by the future mother’s own work on herself.

What should you abstain from when eliminating the fear of childbirth?

Having figured out how to overcome the fear of childbirth and started taking action, you need to eliminate some unnecessary factors from life that can be unsafe for a woman and her baby. Not recommended:

  • use of medications not prescribed by the observing specialist. It is better not to self-medicate, including not taking plant-based medicines. Any substance during pregnancy can cause an allergy in the pregnant woman, which will negatively affect the baby;
  • drinking alcohol and smoking to relieve stress. Remember that there is a baby inside of you that can be extremely negatively affected by these actions;
  • reading too much negative stories and facts from medical practice about problematic childbirth. Try to dose out information about childbirth, concentrate more on positive information, ways to solve various difficulties that arise. Don't take others' negative experiences to heart. What happened to others will not necessarily happen to you;
  • watch negative TV shows and read negative news in the press, especially about pregnancy and childbirth;
  • listen to the stories of other pregnant women, acquaintances, colleagues, friends about someone else’s or personal negative experiences. Don't surround yourself with negativity. In ancient China, from the very beginning of pregnancy, a noble pregnant lady was taken from her usual home to a special room, where until the birth she was surrounded by beautiful interior items, pleasant aromas, music, flowers and a favorable harmonious background. They tried not to disturb her in any way until the birth of the child. Take advantage of the wisdom of the ancient Chinese - take care of your surroundings.

It is not enough to simply take care of how to overcome the fear of childbirth; you need to strengthen the achieved result and make sure that it does not happen again. Instill more confidence that you can handle it, everything will work out for you. Read more literature, consult with specialists, take a walk before bed. Don't let your fears of childbirth take over.

The realization that soon a new addition to your family is waiting for you causes a lot of anxiety among mothers. This is a completely normal condition, since a pregnant woman or a woman planning to become pregnant understands that birth is associated with pain, with possible negative consequences for both the woman herself and her child. However, sometimes anxiety goes beyond the bounds, turning into a real phobia, and women try to find an answer to the question: “Fear of childbirth, how to cope?”

The obstetrician says: “Childbirth is a natural process and was invented by nature itself. No need to be afraid! Moreover, the process is irreversible.”

From his life: “I was very worried when my wife gave birth, although he shouldn’t have!”

What is tokophobia

Tokophobia is considered a strong fear of childbirth, which in some cases turns into a serious mental disorder, resulting in a complete refusal to have children.

Causes and symptoms of mental condition

There are two options for the development of events when a fear of giving birth is formed - a phobia. Most often, the origins of pathology can be found in a girl’s childhood, when she witnessed the pain experienced by her own mother, a difficult birth, or learned about the intricacies of the birth of a child from the stories of friends, from films or the Internet. This type of fear is also called primary fear. If a woman already has a child, then secondary tokophobia arises. It is directly related to the problems experienced at the birth of the first child.

Most often, symptoms of pathology are observed in the third trimester of pregnancy, if it does occur. Typically, girls who are afraid to give birth use several methods of contraception at once, trying to avoid fertilization.

Tokophobia can be recognized by several signs:

  • panic fear at the mention of childbirth and small children;
  • confidence that the birth of a baby will definitely be accompanied by complications;
  • the appearance of abdominal pain, dizziness due to strong emotional stress;
  • apathy, lethargy, lethargy;
  • desire to ease pregnancy by caesarean section, thoughts of abortion.

Factors influencing distribution

Why are women afraid to give birth? Most often, they are afraid of childbirth because of the pain that accompanies the birth process, or they are afraid that something will be wrong with the child, or that they may lose him. I reinforce such fears in the media. Pregnant or simply curious girls watch reports from hospitals, various shows, videos showing the birth process, difficult cases or sick children, which causes a feeling of fear.

Some girls are afraid of childbirth due to sexual harassment and suffering caused; others doubt their physical strength or are afraid of poverty.

The Internet is also becoming a source of panic, where women try to find answers to the questions that concern them. They go to social networks, forums and blogs, confessing and asking for support: I’m very afraid to give birth, what should I do? But in the end they learn about the sad experiences of women in labor, thinking that the same thing will happen to them.

Interesting facts:According to statistics, every seventh woman is afraid to give birth, and among pregnant women this phobia is observed in almost all. Thus, actress Helen Mirren, who watched a film about childbirth as a teenager, decided never to have a child.

And Swedish scientists in 2011 found that fear forces many pregnant women to resort to caesarean section. Thus, out of 353 women who spoke about a phobia, 16.5% insisted on surgery, while out of 579 women who were not afraid of having a baby, only 9.6% asked for medical help.

How to fight

Psychotherapy and hypnosis help women get rid of bad thoughts. When preparing for childbirth, it is important to learn more about the peculiarities of changes in the body, the course of labor with obstetricians, and attend special courses at the hospital. It is important to protect yourself from any negative information regarding the appearance of the fetus, possible deviations, and not build unfounded opinions. To calm down, attend yoga sessions, relaxation sessions, and do breathing exercises.

Most common divisions:

  • I'm afraid to give birth for the first time;
  • fear of giving birth to a second child;
  • 3 children or more;
  • phobia of giving birth to a sick child.

Frequently asked questions and answers from a doctor

I'm afraid of dying during childbirth, what should I do?

Think about what your fear of dying during childbirth is based on; do you personally have any prerequisites for such a development of events? With the development of modern medicine, the probability of death of a woman in labor is almost zero, since in case of abnormalities, doctors will always help you and the baby. If you do not have serious illnesses or problems with blood clotting, then there is nothing to worry about.

I've wanted a child for many years, but I'm afraid. My friends and my mother say that it’s not scary, it’s a natural physiological process, but I’m still afraid to have children.

The only way to get rid of fear is to understand its nature. You say “I’m afraid to have a child,” but you don’t know why? You are afraid of something specific: experiencing pain, not being able to feed him, giving birth to an unhealthy baby, or ruining your figure. Find out what exactly worries you, try to eliminate it.

I have been afraid of getting pregnant and giving birth for many years now, what should I do?

What scares you most is the unknown. Pregnancy is a new condition for you, so in order not to be afraid of it, you need to get more information about childbirth and the growth of the child in the womb. Attend courses and trainings, read literature about raising children, don’t think about the bad. This will help you make the right decision.

How to remove the fear of childbirth, what to do if I’m about to give birth and I’m afraid?

Almost every woman experiences fear of giving birth to one degree or another. Anxiety arises because you do not know enough about the changes occurring in your body. Discuss all the details of childbirth with your doctor, he will tell you how to behave correctly and what the medical staff will do. Fears of childbirth in pregnant women - how to deal with it: prepare everything you need for the maternity hospital, communicate more with loved ones, find someone you trust, let him be present in the room, start buying things for the baby, think about the good.

What can I advise if I am terrified of giving birth?

Panic before childbirth should not bother a pregnant woman, as it will only aggravate the labor process and the birth of the baby will be slower. Determine what exactly you are afraid of, whether your fears are justified, talk about it with an obstetrician and a psychologist. Panic fear of childbirth is in vain, because many women, having seen the baby, are already smiling.

Some mothers are worried not only about labor itself, but also about financial difficulties, and some women have to deal with non-standard situations, for example, when a doctor talks about pregnancy with a large fetus.

What should I do if I want a child, but I’m afraid I don’t have enough money?

Determine exactly what you should have enough money for to be comfortable enough. Think about what you can give up in favor of the baby, what money you will live on while you are on maternity leave. Accumulate a sufficient amount for yourself that will support you in case of a lack of funds, make a list of everything you currently own (apartment, car, cottage), take into account loans. Calculate how much you spend per month without a child, what additional amount you will need after he arrives.

I'm afraid to give birth - I have a large fetus

If the fetal weight is more than 4 kg, mother and baby are monitored more closely at birth. During contractions, the heart is listened to by the obstetrician every time, and if any problems arise, immediate correction is carried out. Immediately after birth, the baby is examined by a neonatologist to rule out injuries and hypoxia. In some cases, the mother is given a drug to stimulate the uterus and an incision is made to avoid rupture. The birth of a large baby takes a little longer, but is generally no different from normal, so the mother should not worry.

Absolutely all women are afraid of childbirth. And even those who claim that they did not feel fear before this important event are most likely lying and embellishing the reality, because fear of childbirth is a normal phenomenon, and “attacks” of this unpleasant feeling are familiar to everyone. The only difference is in strength and duration. Thus, some expectant mothers only momentarily feel a surge of fear, especially in the last months of pregnancy, and there are those who do not even think about conceiving because of fear. So what are the fair sex afraid of? And most importantly, how to cope with fear, and is it even real?

Why is there fear of a second birth?

Do you think only first-time mothers are afraid of childbirth? Of course not. Sometimes the fear of a second birth is much stronger, because the first time we are most often afraid of the unknown, but now we already know exactly what awaits us and what it is like “in practice.” Most often, fear intensifies if:

  • the first birth was complicated;
  • between pregnancies there is too little or, on the contrary, a large difference;
  • During her first birth, the woman encountered “bad” medical staff and the maternity hospital.

There are, of course, other reasons, sometimes so serious and individual that a woman may need the help of a psychotherapist.

We repeat: fear is an inevitable and absolutely normal phenomenon, but it can and must be dealt with, and most importantly, every woman can do this, especially the second time, when there is an experience, even if it’s unpleasant. Childbirth is a process so natural, unique, thought out by Nature itself that we can only accept it correctly, surrender to it and believe that we are able to cope with absolutely everything. It’s clear that this doesn’t sound convincing at all, it’s very figurative and vague, so the fear doesn’t go away.

The trouble is that this feeling is embedded in the subconscious, and no technique can eradicate it if the woman herself is not ready to say goodbye to her fears. But we will still try to direct our thoughts to “taming” fear:

  • Nothing in life is repeated, that is, the second birth will not be at all similar to the first. Think like this: the first ones were “so-so”, and the second ones will only get better. 99% of successful childbirth depends on the positive attitude of the mother in labor.
  • Pain during childbirth is a natural phenomenon, and it is not as severe as it is made out to be. Moreover, the presence of painful contractions is the surest symptom that another beautiful little man will soon be born. As a last resort: it’s the 21st century, don’t forget about the possibilities of medicine, and pain relief for childbirth today is as easy as shelling pears.
  • The pain is passable. These are not false joints, for example, which will make themselves felt for the rest of your life. Contractions last on average several hours, and with each subsequent birth these hour frames narrow. Plus, Nature has awarded a woman enough time for a break - you just need to learn how to use it correctly for relaxation, and not to increase fear and panic.
  • The pain is forgotten - and this is a fact. It is impossible to feel it outside of labor, but it is quite possible to get caught in the “network” of unpleasant memories. Therefore, the task of the expectant mother is very clear: do not remember, do not heat up, do not accept. Many women claim that toothache is much worse.
  • The child is also a full-fledged “accomplice” in the process, so you need to “negotiate” with him, preferably throughout the pregnancy, and during childbirth, communication with the baby is simply vital. During this period, the baby feels his mother more than ever. And in general, for him, birth into this world is much more painful and terrible than for the woman in labor herself. We need to do everything to ensure that the important moment is filled with exclusively positive emotions, that is, first of all, we think not about ourselves, our beloved, but about our continuation.
  • Someone else's experience is someone else's experience. The modern universal availability of information sometimes only gets in the way. And women’s psychology is strange: very few people believe positive stories about childbirth, but all sorts of “horror stories” remain in the memory for life, and from early childhood they are “absorbed” from a variety of sources (take, for example, childbirth scenes from movies: nothing but screaming and, in fact, they don’t show tears). Therefore, you need to make it clear to yourself: I don’t hear anyone, I don’t trust anyone (doctors, psychologists and other professional assistants, of course, don’t count - they are the ones who simply need to be believed and trusted).
  • Not all doctors care about expectant mothers. Despite the fact that horrific stories about the unacceptable attitude of medical staff towards a woman in labor are spreading at the speed of light, and they are buzzing from all sides, not all maternity hospitals and their workers are so terrible and inhumane. Agree, a lot depends on the patient: a compromise is important here, because the rule “the client is always right” does not apply to childbirth.
  • Your life will only get better after giving birth. As sad as it may be, very often the fear of childbirth gives rise to pride and selfishness, but not every woman admits this to herself. The fear of “losing your figure”, the usual disordered rhythm of life, freedom, in the end, many women try to “veil” with other fears. Pregnancy should be desired, then no “horror stories” will scare you.

If these theses do not cause any relief, it means that the fear is deeper and needs to be “worked through” with a psychologist.

“Additional measures” to overcome fear

Every woman approaches her second birth more consciously. Based on your experience, you can correct the “gaps”, and then no fears will befall you. Moreover, these days there are so many opportunities to prepare for an important event and begin the process of childbirth “fully armed”:

  • Courses for pregnant women. Choose them based on recommendations, having carefully studied the topics of the classes and having previously communicated with the “lecturer”, who should be trustworthy and have experience in his field. Be sure to attend these courses together with your husband. They will teach you absolutely (or almost) everything (including how to cope with pain during childbirth).
  • Choosing a maternity hospital and doctor. Remember: you should trust your gynecologist even more than yourself, no matter how strange it may sound. Ideally, the doctor should manage the entire pregnancy and directly attend the birth. Most maternity hospitals today are “equipped” for home comfort, so that a woman feels comfortable in her “native” walls. If this is important to you, do an “audit” of such establishments.
  • Methods of natural labor pain relief. Even if you fail to take courses for pregnant women, take the time to find information on how to relieve pain during labor and childbirth without medical intervention. This task is easy to cope with using a special massage, proper breathing, comfortable poses and even meditation. Take your partner with you during labor, who in difficult times will remind you of all the options and help you implement them.
  • Moral attitude. You can't go anywhere without him. If the birth process has begun, it means that it will definitely end, and no one will give birth instead of the woman (with the exception of a caesarean section). By the way, practice shows that women who believe in God are afraid of childbirth much less often and less, putting themselves in God’s hands and hoping for His help. Confession and Communion before the most important event in life is a huge support in the upcoming birth.

We understand perfectly well that speaking and writing are easy, but coping with fear is much more difficult. Be that as it may, you should not try to overcome the problem alone, but it is imperative to talk about your feelings, your experiences and seek support from those people who speak about childbirth exclusively in “bright colorful colors.”

We sincerely wish every woman an easy birth, and that as a result, strong, healthy babies are born - the more, the better!

Every woman who carries her beloved baby under her heart sooner or later thinks about the impending birth. Some expectant mothers persevere through the waiting period, coping with their fears on their own, but many are in a state of constant stress due to fear of the very process of bringing a child into the world. How not to be afraid of childbirth and spend the last days of pregnancy in a state of rest - we will talk about this further.

Most fears of pregnant women about the upcoming birth are unfounded, and their occurrence can be prevented by studying the necessary information in detail.

We should not forget that childbirth is a natural process, which, thanks to medical advances, can be controlled, thereby reducing possible risks.

Why are women afraid to give birth?

Over time, any pregnant woman thinks about what awaits her during the birth process, even those who are preparing to become a mother not for the first time, because labor does not proceed according to the same scenario every time.

As the due date approaches, most expectant mothers are overcome by panic caused by the unknown and fear. In order to normalize the psycho-emotional state, it is necessary to find out the nature of the fear, as well as whether it corresponds to the real state of affairs or is a far-fetched phobia.

Fear of harming the baby during labor

Many expectant mothers are afraid that when passing through the birth canal the child feels pain, inconvenience, and discomfort. There is, of course, a certain amount of truth in this. If a woman behaves incorrectly during contractions and pushing, there is a high risk of causing some injuries to the baby.

However, in most cases, this fear is unfounded - the bones of the newborn’s skull are so soft and elastic that during the birth process they take on the most comfortable, elongated shape, which allows the baby to pass through the mother’s birth canal without any risk.

Fear of missing the start of labor

Almost every woman knows what the so-called. In essence, these are rhythmic contractions of the uterus, which are intended to prepare the cervix for the upcoming birth, that is, they have nothing directly to do with labor.

In view of this, the pregnant woman is simply afraid that she will confuse training contractions with real ones and will not have time to go to a medical facility in time. However, these abbreviations are easy to distinguish.

If contractions appear regularly, are accompanied by painful sensations, and the rest periods between them are rapidly decreasing, then it’s time to get ready for the maternity hospital.

Fear of pain

It is generally accepted that childbirth is an incredibly painful process that causes incredible suffering to a woman. This is fundamentally wrong. During the period of active labor, a large amount of the so-called “happiness hormone” enters the mother’s blood, which helps reduce pain.

But it would be wrong to say that childbirth is absolutely painless. The level of discomfort felt depends entirely on the woman’s level of preparation, as well as her behavior.

Thus, you can significantly reduce discomfort through proper breathing, as well as the ability to relax when necessary. In addition, pain of this kind tends to be forgotten at the moment when a tiny and long-awaited baby subsides on a woman’s chest.

Fear of breakups

In order to somewhat reduce the risk of their occurrence, it is necessary not only to strictly follow the doctor’s instructions, but also to pay some attention to the perineum during pregnancy, using special creams to increase tissue elasticity.

Fear that childbirth will occur against the background of any serious complications

Of course, no one is immune from this. However, if the pregnancy proceeds safely, without any pathologies, the likelihood that the process will go wrong is very small.

So, almost all fears of childbirth are unfounded. However, most women find it difficult to cope with them, especially those who are expecting their first baby. There are many ways to help you overcome fear and calm down.

It is imperative to use the proposed methods, since the exhausted psycho-emotional state of a pregnant woman negatively affects the child.

Ways to cope with fear

First of all, you should try to convince yourself that existing phobias in most cases are far-fetched. If necessary, it is quite possible to involve both close relatives and a psychologist in this process.

The most common ways that will help the expectant mother cope with fear and anxiety include the following:

  • If a pregnant woman is afraid of pain, it is necessary to consult with a supervising doctor. Currently, there are a lot of medications that will help ease contractions without causing harm to either the expectant mother or the baby;
  • in order to reduce the likelihood of ruptures, it is necessary to regularly perform a set of exercises aimed at increasing the elasticity of the perineal tissues and strengthening the pelvic muscles, and use special creams;
  • If a woman is afraid of confusing training contractions with real ones, it is recommended to talk with a doctor who will help the pregnant woman determine the onset of labor.

In general, in the last months and weeks of pregnancy, the expectant mother needs to pay sufficient attention to her own health and well-being in order to put in order not only her psycho-emotional, but also her physical state.

  • First of all, your diet should be adjusted. It is necessary to eat fresh and as natural products as possible. It is better not to eat heavy, fatty, sweet, canned foods, because they not only have a negative impact on the health of the pregnant woman, but also contribute to a decrease in immunity, as well as sleep disorders.
  • Regular walks in the fresh air are a great way to improve your thoughts and physical condition. Daily leisurely walking helps strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, which will subsequently significantly facilitate the birth process.
  • In moments of particular excitement, it is permissible to drink a small amount of chamomile or mint tea with the addition of honey and lemon. This drink not only tones, improves metabolism, strengthens the immune system, but also effectively relaxes and relieves stress.
  • In the most severe cases, it is permissible to take mild sedatives. Such drugs should be taken in exceptional cases and only after consulting a doctor.
  • Water procedures will also help to have a calming effect, and during the onset of active labor, relieve discomfort. A warm shower or bath, favorite cosmetics - together, this will allow a woman to relax and calm down her anxiety.
  • In order to know what sensations accompany this process, as well as how to behave most competently during this period, a pregnant woman is recommended to attend courses for pregnant women, where specialists will not only answer all your questions, but will also significantly reduce existing fears or even dispel them.

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