A declaration of love is a reverent and exciting moment that occurs between two people. Not everyone can immediately understand and accept this feeling, not to mention convey it to their other half. It is unlikely that anyone will tell you exactly the time when you need to do this; it is different for everyone. The words “I have loved you for a long time” are so desired and necessary in a relationship that you should not delay in revealing your feelings to your loved one.

Why do people confess their love? Often we are guided by our feelings, which push us to take this step. Of course, there are exceptions and intentions sometimes differ, but I want to believe in the best.

Who should be the first to take such an important step and be the first to confess their love?

In fact, this is not so important, although we are accustomed to thinking that the first step should be taken by a man. In fact, studies have shown that representatives of the stronger sex love and want to hear three main words from a girl before starting intimate life. But at this stage, these words can frighten the fair sex, because it seems to them that this is being said only to get them into bed.

Typically, men think about confessing their feelings after three months of a relationship, while women mature a little longer - about five. But in the realities of the modern world, everything moves at a breakneck pace and sometimes happens much faster.

Many girls wonder whether they should be the first to confess their love to their chosen one?

Sometimes it’s difficult to answer this question for yourself. Those who follow their hearts are worthy of respect, but there are not so many of them. For some reason, society believes that such a gesture is very indecent, but believe me, these are all stereotypes.

To think carefully about this issue, you can weigh the pros and cons:

• Pros

  1. If your significant other responds in kind, then your relationship may develop into something serious over time, and you will be proud that you dared to admit this. If your boyfriend loves you too, he will appreciate your determination and sincerity.
  2. If you are so in love that it doesn’t let you sleep at night, but he doesn’t pay any attention to you, then admitting it can improve the situation or help you let it go, because suffering in ignorance is much worse.
  3. Not all guys can decide to take such a step, because there are quite a lot of modest people, and recognition will awaken them and force them to act. And if you don’t say these words, you will never hear the answer. This is necessary for the development of your relationship.

• Cons

  1. Sometimes circumstances are such that a girl’s confession does not always please a guy. So, be mentally prepared if it happens that he may not react quite adequately to your step and laugh or not reciprocate, anything can happen.
  2. Moreover, if a guy was brought up in strictness, then after your confession he may change his disposition towards you and begin to consider you a frivolous and immodest girl. But then the question is: why do you need such a complex gentleman?
  3. It happens that men absolutely do not want to recognize the lady’s right to speak first in love. By declaring your love, you may get to know your loved one from a different perspective. And it is possible that he will stop attracting you if there is an inadequate reaction to your words. The point is debatable, so whether this is a plus or a minus is up to you to decide.
  4. Another argument against is: if the relationship suddenly doesn’t work out, you will regret your sincerity. After all, it’s difficult to open up to a person, and there are situations when after that you gnaw at yourself for not acting differently.

Confess your love to your beloved guy

If confessing your love to a guy first is your sincere desire and need of your soul, then you are unlikely to regret it.

After these arguments, you will understand for yourself whether you can confess your love to this person at the moment, or maybe you should wait, or maybe even try to forget about these feelings.

Once upon a time, I myself was wondering whether I should confess my love to a guy and my life situations were different, but I think that regretting it is at least stupid. In any case, you either learn a life lesson and draw conclusions for yourself, or you are in seventh heaven that you tried and were right. This is all an experience that is simply necessary, so you shouldn’t isolate yourself regardless of the outcome.

Confess your love to your beloved man

When confessing your love to your beloved man, try to find the right words and moment. It will be better if you prepare your chosen one for this step in advance; he should at least guess a little about your feelings. Otherwise, the cherished words may come as a shock and surprise to him, and in such a situation people sometimes behave quite strangely. Show your beloved boy signs of attention, this will at least bring him a little closer to the necessary conclusions.

On that very day, make sure that he is in a good mood, because in a bad mood the reaction can be aggressive, you never know what happens in life. Also make sure that you are alone and there are as few distractions as possible, so that nothing spoils that very moment. There is no need to prepare any long prepared speeches; it is better that everything comes from the heart. Just say that very phrase sincerely, which will make your intentions clear and don’t be afraid of refusal, because we are all human. In extreme cases, you can refer to the fact that it was all a bad joke. Then the man will at least think about a possible relationship, and then reciprocity is not far away.

Confess your love to a guy if you're shy

If you are shy and don’t know how to confess your love to a guy, then there are a couple of ways that will help you. For example, you can give something to a young man and attach a letter to this thing, which will contain everything you want to say. Or you can arrange a dinner together (breakfast or lunch, or even an afternoon snack!), prepare treats, for example cookies, which will contain a special note. Just don’t forget to warn your chosen one about the surprise.

Confess your love to a married man

If you realize that you have feelings for a married man, then you should be more careful. Let's not be moralists and accept the situation as it is, but you yourself first understand whether you need it. And most importantly, think about the consequences, because they can be completely unpredictable. You can, of course, talk at the meeting, if there is such an opportunity, you can give him the letter personally, or you can remain silent. Under no circumstances should you impose yourself or put pressure on such a person, because this can only push him away.

How can you beautifully admit this bright feeling?

You can express your love in a variety of ways, for example:

1. A rather sweet way is to whisper words in your loved one’s ear. There is some intimacy in this and such a stop encourages trust.
2. You can give him a surprise in the form of a balloon with a note inside or attach it to a ribbon.
3. A love letter still remains one of the most beautiful confessions, because there is something so mysterious and reverent in it.
4. Write a poem or your own song in which you express your feelings.
5. Send a voice card with a declaration of love.
6. Arrange a romantic date on the roof, with a beautiful view of the city at night and shamanic.
7. Bake a cake and write three words on it.
8. Buy wine and sweets, and hide a note among them.

The list can be continued. The main thing is to show imagination and care.

Confess your love in your own words

Confessing your love in your own words can be quite difficult, but it’s very sweet.

Here are some mistakes you can make:

• do not take your gaze to the floor, direct it straight into his eyes;
• do not glare at the man;
• avoid passionate confessions;
• do not prepare a long speech;
• no need to worry too much.

Confess your love in prose

Some interesting confessions in prose:

1. “If I had a seven-flowered flower, I would make seven wishes. The first thing I want to always be with you. The second thing is that I wish to always be yours. Third, I want us to never quarrel. Seventh: I dream that all these wishes will come true tenfold. I love you, my flower."
2. “My beloved, we have known you for a very short time, but from the first minute of meeting this pleasant and warm feeling arose in me - love”;
3. “I don’t know what words to choose so that you feel and understand my love. She is higher than the sky, brighter than the sun, deeper than the ocean and purer than the morning dew. I love you";

How to declare your love in an original way:

• write a paid message to the newspaper that he usually reads, with words of recognition. True, a few dozen more people will see this, but to each his own;
• who said that only guys can write confessions on the asphalt? No one forbade us girls from doing this. So go ahead!
• Give your loved one a massage and write out the words with your finger, asking them to guess them in advance.

Nowadays, you can confess by SMS, but there are a few but:

• there is no need to take some kind of template text, let it sound from the heart;
• don't cut from the shoulder. Start from afar, asking how you are, what’s going on at work, how’s your mood, and if everything suits you, then admit it;
• give him time to think and don’t expect a quick response.

Confess your love on VK (VKontakte)

Of course, modern teenagers quite often admit their feelings on VKontakte and this is considered quite normal. You can set a status with a declaration of feelings, but it is better, of course, to send a personal message, which will be a kind of letter, only in electronic form.

Confess your love to a pen pal

Many of us have had pen pals at different ages. And I’m no exception, because I had this situation when I was 12 years old. There are times when you are at a distance and cannot see each other, but the feelings are still overwhelming. And whether you are 11 years old, 14 or 18, it will remain so. Don’t be shy, perhaps this is mutual and in the future you will be able to find an opportunity to meet in person, the person should know about this.

What should you do if a guy confesses his love to you?

Well, of course, everything depends directly on you. If the feelings are mutual, then respond in the same way as he did, but if this is not quite the case, then try to refuse in such a way as not to offend the other person too much, because it wasn’t easy for him anyway.

Under no circumstances should you swear or get angry, because the guy is not to blame for this. It’s better to have a heart-to-heart talk and find out everything. It’s possible that you’re not that into him right now, but when you get to know him better and you start dating, you’ll fall head over heels, so don’t rush to conclusions.

If a man confesses his love while drunk

If you were presented with such a gift and the man confesses his love while drunk, then of course the situation is sensitive. As they say, what's on a sober person's mind is on a drunken person's tongue. Perhaps he lacked the courage or something stopped him from doing this earlier and he is quite sincere. But there is a possibility that in the morning the gentleman will want to retract his words, so don’t rush to agree with everything, it’s better to wait a day.

How to make someone confess their love

Getting someone to confess their love is not an easy task. Of course, if a person doesn’t feel anything for you, then only a love spell will help. And if you see that a man is clearly not indifferent, but something is preventing him from taking this step, then it’s worth thinking about how you can push him to take this step.

Perhaps it is worth hinting that you also harbor the same feelings and bring them to a heart-to-heart conversation. Or you can tell him this is the first thing that will entail a response.

You can see how to confess your love in these videos:

We also recommend an interesting film and anime on this topic.

“How hard it is to confess your love” Indian film:

The premiere of the film How Difficult to Confess Love (Khushi) took place in 2003.

Karan and Khushi meet at Bombay University and immediately become close friends. A little more time passes and they can no longer live without each other.

But both are very proud, often quarrel and never dare to confess their love to each other. That’s why they leave for vacation without explaining themselves. And at home, Khushi’s father, to whom she also didn’t tell anything about her feelings, picked her a groom...

“I have loved you for a long time or how to open your feelings to your beloved” anime:

• Year: 2016
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How to open your feelings to your loved one? The question is certainly interesting, because there are many ways to confess your love. Some people are afraid of this step, others have difficulties. Now there will be a great way to put everything in its place and confess your feelings:

• You can make some surprise in the form of a romantic dinner. The advice is universal; it is suitable for both men and girls. But male representatives must confess their love, so he is preferable for them. You should think through everything, buy flowers, a small gift, prepare a short speech. By inviting your beloved, create the atmosphere of a fairy tale for her and make her believe in a miracle. Confess your love, it will be quite simple to do.
• Show your imagination and do everything as you can imagine. Do something unusual and admit that you love the person. It should be unexpected, bright and very memorable. If you can win the heart of your beloved, rest assured that she will stay with you for life.

In the question of how to open your feelings, everyone is looking for something special for themselves. Much depends on a person’s upbringing and behavior, his character. Everyone will find their own individual way, that's guaranteed.

For example, a person who is used to doing everything according to a clear plan will probably plan the entire process and take into account every little detail. He will come up with a perfect confession, where everything was written out in seconds. Some people don't like romance and their confession can be a little dry.

After confession, there may be two options for the development of events - either they will tell you “yes” or they will answer “no”. In any situation you need to remain calm. Don't react too harshly to any unforeseen situations, be calm. If a girl refuses you, it may mean that she is simply not ready for such a responsible step yet.

By the way, what should you do if you are afraid to go and make a confession? The only thing that will help is to rethink the situation. You need to do one important thing - understand for yourself the fact that in reality there is nothing wrong with such an action. You are simply going to say what you feel towards the person. Don't even think about the bad, be positive only. Even if they refuse you, think about what’s wrong, correct the shortcomings and go on the attack again. At one point you will definitely be lucky and you will be able to find yourself with your loved one.

How to open your feelings to your loved one if they are not mutual? The question is very stupid, since there is no point in such confessions. Just let go of the person who doesn't feel anything towards you. Why do you need something that has no future? It’s better to look for a new soul mate, with whom everything will definitely work out. It is not at all necessary to live in illusions and wait for people to love you. Love here and now. You shouldn’t even go and embarrass yourself, you shouldn’t go to someone who doesn’t give a damn about you, to put it bluntly.

Is it worth declaring your love? You don't need to rush into this matter, as the most important thing is to learn as much as possible about each other. At a minimum, you should just communicate for several months. For a long time? This will allow, after confession, not to separate after just a couple of days of living together. When choosing your soul mate, you can’t rush, you need to make a careful selection.

Only after you have gotten to know your future soul mate better can you make a decision: confess or break up without talking about love, which in reality does not exist.

I decided to please you, my dears, with valuable material. This is an article from the blog of world relationship expert Matthew Hussey, who is my age and even a Gemini :)

I translated it with great pleasure!

Steve helped me write the Get The Guy book and he is a wealth of knowledge on relationships and dating.

Communication is opportunities. Communication has endless potential, but we rarely explore it and take our first steps into new territory.

This article will show you how to lead conversations along the right paths and avoid a constant routine in communication.

So, Stephen thinks:

Constant conversations do not always involve live communication. - Joel, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

Any relationship begins with a conversation.

Every friendship is defined by a series of experiences and the discussion of those experiences.

Even every meaningless, passionate, wild sex is accompanied by a strange dialogue from the series - who are we and what are we doing here in the Universe?

Conversations never lose their importance. They determine how well you know your spouse, the quality of your relationships with colleagues and friends, and how you influence people and attract them into your life.

There are many books about sub-communication and nonverbalism that believe that the words we speak hardly mean anything. I don't believe them.

Boring writing, boring conversations become tasteless, dry, clichéd, routine and drag you into a nightmare generated by hell if it is impossible to avoid them.

Anticipation of an unpleasant conversation is the reason why you flinch and refuse to answer when you see some family friend or relative calling you. It's boring because you can predict the entire conversation.

Routine has become outdated and has lost its meaning. The conversation will simply be another reminder that you would never speak to a person if you were not related by blood.

The same thing happens in our personal lives.

Here's an imaginary but typical conversation between two people over dinner.

-How's work?

Great.

How's Bill?

Bill is doing well.

By the way, did you call the electrician today?

We also need to choose furniture this weekend. Shall we go to the store on Saturday? Have you decided about the sofa yet?

The questions are passing, the answers are flat.
,
On a permanent basis, they hurt the heart and cause mental anguish if tolerated for a long time. Two people can talk, but never know anything about what is going on inside them. Because not every conversation has depth and connection.

I believe that conversations can change our lives and even save them. The best conversation is one in which one encourages the other to open up their souls and not be afraid to explore what's inside.

Here are a few ways:

1) Ask questions that allow you to open up emotionally.

People have a very strong need to open up to others. Director Kevin Smith believes that people have three needs: Food, Sex and the Need to Be Heard.

But people will be afraid to open up for many reasons. They are shy. They are afraid of the answer... They are British :) So they need permission to express themselves emotionally.

How easy is it to do this?

Ask how they feel about something. For example:

How did you feel when you broke the marathon record?

Was it difficult for you to cope with your parents' divorce?

What thoughts did you have when they told you they were hiring you?

These questions provoke the disclosure of emotions. They cut through logic and invite the other to see their feelings, which makes them feel a deep connection with their partner. A great recent article in the Huffington Post talks about how one couple implemented reflective questions like these into their lives.

I more than agree.

Great questions make people look forward to talking to you because you allow them to talk about subjects and feelings that they wouldn't normally talk about.

2) Use Sigmund Freud's method.

When a man opens up to you, be almost impartial in your responses. Don't judge him. Don't criticize or sigh when he says he did something shameful, crazy or bad. Let him feel that it is natural, then show more curiosity. In other words, give the other person more space to talk. Psychotherapists have listening skills and provoke questions that promote greater depth in communication. Be generous and motivate him to give more.

How was it?

What else happened?

Is there anything else that worries or excites you right now?

Is this something you've always wanted to do?

People tend to open up when

a) feel a LOT of freedom in communication

b) understand that they will not be judged for their actions

c) they see that you are interested in hearing their answer.

Do this and people will feel easy and at ease talking to you on any topic.

3) Let him be the expert

What would you tell someone starting a business today?
What's the most important thing you learned about yourself while living in that country?
How do you keep fit?

These are interesting questions because they reveal a person's inner beliefs and life perspectives that you can relate to your own. People think they need to know a lot about someone else to be in a deep relationship with them, but that doesn't require knowledge: just ask them to teach you or give you advice.

4) Show that you are vulnerable too

Don't be stoic, otherwise people will feel your "coldness". Show that you are alive, that you are vulnerable and that you have fears. It’s not like “I’m in a complete nightmare”, but enough to understand that you are imperfect and you are in harmony with it. As long as you easily show with humor that you don’t take them seriously, people will love your shortcomings.

5) Change your banal phrases

If you notice that you always end your sentences the same way, become more honest. Ask yourself. What do I really think about this? Why am I hiding this? Am I trying to protect myself from something? Expand your boundaries every time and you will get used to speaking more sincerely. Understand the phrases you repeat in response to questions over and over again and answer honestly.

6) Encourage him to talk about what he likes to do.

Engage him with conversations about dreams and global plans. Ask what he would like to achieve when he looks at himself at the end of his life or what he would like people to say about him in the future. The future is great because it's easy for people to be excited about upcoming plans and you learn a lot about inner ideals when you ask about dreams and goals. A conversation can change someone's life. We can deeply influence people a right question or a sincere answer, or when we allow someone to express something that they have been keeping to themselves for a long time. People may love to talk, but that doesn't mean those conversations are valuable. We should be exceptions, beacons of truth among lies, an attraction of the living against posing and superficiality. We have a chance with every word, in a world full of tension, to become a person who speaks only to the point. Or at least you'll be invited to more parties.

Greetings, my dear ones!

Today I will tell you about an insidious and very common mistake of many women with whom I work and meet in life.

“I love him, but I hide it well. After all, if he finds out, that’s it! He will play with me like a doll and use me as he wants. A man must conquer a woman. And if she’s already at his feet, he loses interest.”

And few people seriously think about the consequences that suppress feelings in relationships lead to.

Let us remember the natural function of a woman in a couple – to LOVE.

The male natural function in a couple is to PROTECT.

If a woman does not send a flow of love to a man, he does not have much desire or strength to protect her.

And vice versa, if a man does not provide a woman with a reliable support, she has little chance of revealing her love.

One person in a couple can “turn on” the other. Why not you?

Let's think about what happens when a woman suppresses her feelings?

A man, fulfilling his function, but not receiving warmth and tenderness, does not stay in a relationship for long.

The stronger sex needs the openness of their beloved. He longs to see her happy eyes shining with love! A woman with her love can easily ignite a man's love for herself.

At the same time, you need to learn to express your feelings. Just saying some cherished words is not enough. The barriers that have been ingrained in us since childhood do not always allow us to easily and warmly send a stream of light to our beloved.

But you don’t have to say anything - it’s enough not to hide, to express your love and admiration with your gaze, action, and care.

Now I propose to figure out where the belief came from that after declaring his love a man will lose interest?

You could write a book on this topic, it is so multifaceted.

It so happened that in our mentality the concept of “love” is mixed with other concepts that are not even close.

If he loved me:

he would do it for me...
he wouldn't have left...
he would forgive me...
he would have endured my whims...
he would like to start a family with me...
And love is a feeling, a state.

It doesn't need action.

Where action is expected, a desire to own is implied. And power is far from equal to love. It is power that often kills love.

Let's continue.

Slogans we hear around:

Children should love their parents
A wife should love her husband, and a husband should love his wife
Must, must, must...
And love is just a feeling. It either exists or it doesn’t. It is impossible to love out of “shoulds.”

So it turns out that when a woman reveals her feelings to a man, stereotypes are layered on both.

If I said that I love him, he should also tell me that, otherwise I will be offended...
(we remember that love is a feeling, not an obligation).

If expectations are not met, resentment arises, the woman closes down and, as a result, the man really loses interest.

She showed her feelings, which means that now obligations and resentments will fall on my head. We need to do something.
If he sees that the woman continues to shine and opens up more and more, that she does not expect anything from him, but only enjoys spending time together, he relaxes and launches his male protection function with full power. And after some time he will want to talk about his love.

To summarize, the question is not whether to show your feelings or not. The question is with what emotion to do this and what motive to follow.

I am for opening your feelings without expectations and enjoying the happiness of loving. After all, when we love, it’s good for us! And the man feels good with us!

Every person needs warm relationships and love. Every person enjoys being loved.

Open up to your partner. Speak tender words to him. Hug him whenever you want. And don't do all this when there is no impulse.

Follow your desire, follow your feelings, trust your intuition!

How to attract men. 50 rules of a confident woman Sergeeva Oksana Mikhailovna

Rule No. 38. Help a man reveal his feelings

Many girls are interested in how to get recognition from a man? What needs to be done to make him talk about love? Do not seek a declaration of love, but create the necessary conditions for the man to reveal his feelings. Here we will talk about how not to act and what common mistakes girls make when they are desperate to hear words of love from their chosen one.

Some girls, in order to achieve recognition, try to pity a man: “Oh, I love you so much, but you don’t love me at all. I'm so unhappy." Believing that all methods are good in love, they begin to cry and become despondent. Sometimes girls use the “offense” technique: they become sad and pout to show how upset they are by the lack of attention. Now, if they were told how much they were loved, they would forgive everything in the world and would not be offended anymore.

A man, observing what is happening, can say the desired words. But the question is: how sincere is this recognition? How much of it was done in good faith? Do not try to manipulate a man and play on his feelings. This will not lead to anything good.

Another common mistake is to insist on the need for feedback and feedback. “I’m telling you about my love - and you do the same.” It won't work.

Well, a completely ridiculous way to provoke a man to make a confession is to leave, slamming the door. This, by the way, is one of the most common methods that girls resort to with the hope that they will be returned and said those very long-awaited words. It is quite possible that this will happen. However, a confession obtained in this way will turn out to be implausible and insincere. So think before you take such a step. Don't provoke a man. After all, he may not return you.

There is another common way of “fishing out” recognition. A woman tries to please a man in bed, and then asks about his feelings. Of course, sex is an important component of a relationship. However, if you want to hear the true voice of your lover’s heart, then you should not mix sexual pleasures and expression of feelings.

What to do if a man is dumb as a fish? Do not provoke or irritate a man with requests. Your task is to gently and unobtrusively win over recognition. First of all, you yourself must be honest and frank with him. Confess your love only if you are sure of your feelings. If you are doing this only to gain his recognition or to bring him into a frank conversation, then this is the wrong path.

It happens that a man simply cannot say about his feelings because he does not find the right moment. Routine and everyday life are not conducive to expressing feelings. Why express them if everything is going as usual? Create such a moment, add new impressions, do something unusual and unexpected.

It happens that a man needs distance in order to understand himself and his feelings. You can go somewhere for a while in order to give him the opportunity to think, reflect on what your relationship is for him and how much he values ​​it.