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Customs and rites of matchmaking: modern realities. Bride matchmaking ritual, Russian traditions

In order to find out how matchmaking takes place, you should turn to ancient customs and traditions, many of which have survived to this day. Since ancient times, young people and their relatives approached the matchmaking ritual very seriously, because without the consent of the bride’s parents it was impossible to have a wedding. Modern brides and grooms are increasingly turning to the ritual of matchmaking to introduce relatives to each other and establish friendly relations between them, replacing the popular “bride price” during a wedding.

Matchmaking in Rus' took place in every family, regardless of class. There were many traditions and superstitions associated with the ritual, which they tried to observe.

Matchmakers were honorary residents of the village or village, the number of whom could be any, because the bride was chosen more for procreation than for the groom. In some provinces, clergy and even matchmakers could act as matchmakers. The main goal of both was to praise the merits of the bride or groom and remain silent about their shortcomings.

The ceremony took place mainly after sunset. The groom and his matchmakers rode up to the bride's house on horseback and, having entered the bride's house, performed some actions customary in the area (for example, opening the oven door). Based on these actions, the bride's parents understood the intentions of the guests and invited them into the house. Next, there was a conversation between the groom and the bride’s father, and, in his absence, with his older brother.

A samovar and a loaf of bread were always placed on the table. While the bride was pouring tea, the groom could see her advantages. After the meal, the matchmakers praised the virtues of the groom, his farmland, and property in order to receive a dowry for the bride and learn more about her.

After the consent of the parents, a date was set for the “official” matchmaking, where the groom’s parents were already present and the dates of the wedding were discussed.

Modern matchmaking

Today, the matchmaking ceremony is more reminiscent of meeting the parents of the bride and groom, but some traditions have survived to this day.

Before matchmaking, the groom should think about what gifts to prepare for the bride’s parents, having learned about their preferences from the future wife. When visiting, matchmakers usually bring treats, wine, fruits, and always flowers for women. For the bride, the groom can purchase jewelry as a sign of serious intentions.

The choice of matchmakers should also be taken quite seriously. They should have an idea of ​​how matchmaking works on the part of the groom and what needs to be said and done to make the event successful. For the role of matchmaker or matchmaker, they choose a cheerful, positive person who is fluent in speech and knows how to amuse the audience and competently talk about all the advantages of the groom.

Stages of matchmaking on the part of the groom

  • The groom's matchmakers prepare an opening speech, the essence of which boils down to praising the groom's virtues, his love for the bride and his intention to marry her. The speech can be either in poetry or in prose.
  • Matchmakers can jokingly ask the bride to complete some tasks so that she can show her thriftiness and care for her future husband.
  • After the guests have been invited to the table, the groom must formally ask the bride’s parents for permission to give his beloved one in marriage. This moment must be approached very seriously without inappropriate jokes and pathos.
  • With the consent of the parents, the wedding date, preparation costs and other nuances are discussed.

Matchmakers can prepare in advance several funny toasts on the topic of matchmaking, ask someone close to you to organize a photo or video shoot. Subsequently, you can arrange a family viewing of a video or album.

What to say and what to do to the bride

The future wife needs to know how the bride's matchmaking process takes place in order to properly prepare for the arrival of guests.

  • Traditionally, there should be a loaf on the table, which was cut by the bride and treated to the groom and the matchmakers. If you can’t prepare it yourself, you can buy it in a store or order it from a bakery.
  • Another important attribute was the towel. The bride presented it as a gift to the groom or matchmakers as a sign of consent to marriage, and subsequently it was kept in a safe place and not used. This was a kind of amulet for the future family.
  • The best home-cooked dishes should be served on the table so that guests can appreciate the generosity of the hostess and her daughter.
  • The matchmakers are met by the bride's parents and relatives. Consent is never given right away, but only after the guests gather at the table and the groom formally asks the parents for his daughter’s hand in marriage.
  • The bride should show all her housekeeping and care at the feast, because her future relatives, in particular her mother-in-law, are looking at the bride.

Perhaps these are the main points that should be followed when organizing a matchmaking ceremony these days. Although some young couples hold the event according to ancient Russian customs with appropriate paraphernalia, costumes, three horses, songs and dances. The choice remains only for the young; the main thing is that the matchmaking should take place on a positive note and leave only pleasant memories.

In the modern world, a guy and a girl most often independently decide to tie the knot. Nevertheless, many people want to conduct a classic matchmaking on the part of the groom. How is the ritual performed these days? What should the traditional matchmaking of a bride be like among Russians? We answer all questions.

Matchmaking traditions

In Rus', matchmaking was preceded by a show, during which the groom and his relatives - an older brother, uncle or godfather - came to the bride's house. The purpose of this visit was to evaluate the girl and her talents. If the groom liked her, soon matchmakers were sent to her house.

They were very careful about choosing the day for matchmaking. We didn’t go to the bride’s house on the thirteenth, on Wednesdays and Fridays. Most often they got married on the Intercession of the Blessed Virgin Mary - October 14th.

The groom had to rush to the girl’s house as soon as possible in order to avoid damage and the evil eye, but the matchmakers entered the house only after the third invitation. Guests in the house were seated in a special way, which demonstrated their intentions. The conversation started at first about something distant and only gradually got down to business.

According to the rules of matchmaking, the girl should have been silent and, with her back turned to the guests, raked out the ash from the stove. In order to demonstrate her family's wealth and her beauty, she could change her outfit about five times.

Matchmakers
could examine the girl very meticulously in order to find flaws and reduce the ransom. If the groom did not like the bride, he only put the glass presented to him to his lips and left it full. If the girl was to his liking, he drank the glass to the bottom. The girl, in turn, could bring a pumpkin to the disgruntled groom.

The bride's parents negotiated, and the father made the decision whether to marry her to this groom or not. Matchmakers could come to the house more than once and be refused. At this time, the girl's father was choosing the most suitable match for his daughter.

Modern matchmaking

It is significantly different from the ritual that took place before. Nowadays, few people prepare texts in verse, and the visit itself in most cases ends with the agreement of the parties.

You can go to matchmaking with the groom's parents either independently or by inviting relatives or professional matchmakers. Male matchmakers must be married, but female matchmakers must be unmarried.

How to properly match the bride to the groom's parents?

  1. First, you need to discuss in advance a date and time for the visit that is convenient for the bride’s parents.
  2. The guy must definitely give the girl, her mother and sisters flowers.
  3. The boy's parents are preparing a gift for the girl's father and mother. Most often they give cigars, wine, elite alcohol, books, beautiful dishes, decorative items, and sweets. There is nothing wrong if the guy asks the girl in advance what gift to give her parents.

The groom's mother can give her future daughter-in-law some expensive gift. For example, jewelry.

Matchmaking by the bride

The bride's parents should greet the matchmakers by thoroughly cleaning the house and tidying up the yard. The home is the face of the bride, so it is important to create the most comfortable atmosphere possible. They try to place the dowry in a prominent place to demonstrate the family's wealth.

Young woman
must be directly involved in preparing treats for the matchmakers. Traditional dishes of national cuisine are most often prepared. The bride's task is to demonstrate her culinary talents and skills. It is advisable to bake a pie or cake yourself.

The modern matchmaking scenario allows you to answer all the guests’ questions impromptu, without preparing words and poems in advance.

It is also customary to give return gifts for matchmaking to the groom's parents. A basket of fruit or sweets, wine, an icon, a home amulet, a book, or a beautiful indoor flower will do.

The girl should dress modestly, not too flashy:

The bride's matchmaking takes place with the active participation of the girl herself, because her task is to show herself from the best side:

  1. First of all, the girl needs to monitor the cleanliness and empty plates on the table: remove excess dishes and dirty napkins in a timely manner, refill guests’ glasses and serve dishes.
  2. During a conversation, it is customary for her to remain silent and not enter into arguments or discussions.
  3. You should not make toasts, ask questions, praise or criticize yourself and others.
  4. It is not customary to hug and kiss the groom in front of your parents, even if the young couple have been together for a long time.
  5. You should not drink a lot of alcohol or overeat on food.

It is better for a girl to discuss some questions with her parents in advance so as not to get into an awkward situation.

How is matchmaking going today?

You can match the bride to both the groom's parents or close relatives (godparents, older brothers, uncles), or the guy himself. The meeting of matchmakers traditionally takes place in the bride’s house, but today matchmaking is also allowed on neutral territory - in a restaurant, at a recreation center, etc.

It is customary to dress the matchmaker and the groom's side with embroidered towels. They are the first to enter the house, bow and start a conversation.

Can
You can also hire professional matchmakers who know exactly how to get married correctly and will help turn the ceremony into a relaxed and fun celebration.

The bride's matchmaking takes place in an allegorical form; no one directly states the purpose of the visit. Matchmakers imagine everything in the form of jokes and entertainment between the relatives of the future bride and groom.

The matchmaking ritual does not necessarily require the presence of alcohol on the table, but often the future father-in-law wants to have a drink with his future son-in-law. The groom can refuse if this is accepted normally by the girl’s father.

Modern matchmaking scenario

If you wish, you can prepare a matchmaking script in advance. If the ritual is planned to be traditional, then everything may look something like this:


The bride doesn’t have to show herself to the guests for the first time - this will help maintain the intrigue and will be a little reminiscent of traditional matchmaking, when the girl could sit locked up all the time.

Nowadays matchmaking can be organized in a more unconventional way by preparing a cool scenario in advance:

  1. The groom's matchmakers begin to speak, twisting traditional phrases into a modern twist.
  2. Then they may start asking the girl tricky questions, for example, what kind of instant noodles she will brew, what borscht is made from.

    To make it fun, you can prepare in advance a bag with leaves on which there will be funny answer options.

    The girl, having received a question, without looking, takes out her answer. So, when asked about borscht, you can pull out a set of ingredients such as an axe, a banana and a diaper. When asked what she will swaddle the baby in, the answer may be “cabbage.” It turns out very fun and relaxed.

  3. The bride's relatives can ask the groom to perform a comic task: hammer a crooked nail into a piece of wood or open a jar using improvised means. Another option is tricky questions about salary, housework and helping your future spouse.

Words
for matchmaking, they are prepared in advance, but the texts are all purely individual and depend on the character and habits of the matchmakers, the young people and their parents. It is very important to take into account the characteristics of the parents; perhaps some of them are very reserved and conservative. You can't put anyone in an awkward position. It is better not to use vulgar or sexually suggestive jokes.

What do they say at matchmaking?

You should also prepare toasts for matchmaking. Usually they raise their glasses to the bride and groom and their parents and wish these people love, health and prosperity.

Parents wish young people healthy and strong children, a happy married life, and give good advice. The guy and girl thank their parents for their blessing.

The mother-in-law and father-in-law promise to love their future daughter-in-law like their own daughter, and she, in turn, promises to call them mom and dad. The guy and his mother-in-law and father-in-law make the same promises.

You can prepare toasts in verse:

No, it’s not easy, it’s very difficult to link two destinies into one.

And today we can congratulate you on your engagement.

Now you need to solve a very difficult problem -

Love each other every day to maintain happiness,

Well, if things get tough, don’t immediately run to mom!

If the groom goes to matchmaking alone, then he should prepare all kinds of praise for himself.

You need to translate useful information about yourself into a humorous and playful form:

  • where he was born and lived;
  • who the parents are, what they do and earn;
  • where did you study;
  • what achievements does he have (in sports, business, what does he do besides work);
  • where and by whom he works;
  • how much he earns and how he plans to provide for his future wife;
  • where will the young family live;
  • how many children does he want?

The girl should be praised, making sincere and open compliments, and also promise to love, carry in her arms, help around the house, etc.

You can start with something like these words: “Dear parents, get out of the way! I'm coming to you on an urgent matter. I heard that your daughter is beautiful, the likes of which has never been seen in this world. I am the most suitable groom for her. I ask you to give your word and I’ll tell you why you can’t find a better son-in-law than me.”

After
With these words, the guy hands the girl and mother flowers, and the girl’s father invites the guy into the house. Parents, in response to the groom’s words, praise their daughter, talking about her beauty, intelligence and thriftiness, and ask the guy about his attitude towards family and children, and towards household responsibilities.

The matchmaking ends with a decision - whether the girl’s parents will give their daughter in marriage to the groom. After their consent, the date of the viewing is agreed upon. On this day, the girl's parents go to the groom's house. Often bridesmaids are not held, limiting themselves only to matchmaking. In this case, the holding of the wedding, the number of guests on each side, and the distribution of expenses are discussed at the table.

The matchmaking of the bride by the groom is a very interesting and colorful ceremony. If a guy and a girl decide to follow this tradition, they should be well prepared and be sure to shoot a video for the family archive. Folk costumes - embroidered shirts, sundresses, traditional scarves - will look especially beautiful during matchmaking.

Many wedding traditions that our ancestors observed now seem ridiculous and ridiculous to us. And marriage is no longer a necessity, but a joint and necessarily voluntary desire of two lovers.

Matchmaking is considered the beginning of preparations for a wedding. The ritual of asking for the bride's hand in marriage is a truly touching and unforgettable event. But some newlyweds refuse such a tradition, considering it a relic of the past. Still, for many couples, matchmaking means meeting the parents of the future spouses. Young people are trying to modernize the event and make it a holiday. So, how should a groom get married in our time? What should I say?

Future spouse in the spotlight

On the day of matchmaking, great responsibility lies with the groom, who must come to the bride’s parental home and show his best side. Traditionally, the future husband comes to dinner with flowers and symbolic gifts. There must be two bouquets: for the beloved and for her mother. A box of chocolates, champagne or good wine is suitable as a gift.

Matchmaking customs from ancestors

An ancient tradition has survived to this day, following which matchmakers brought with them a loaf on a towel. The future wife carefully cut the cake and served it to all the guests, starting with her parents. This meant that she agreed to the marriage. Bread must be eaten down to crumbs so that the family is strong and happy. Then the same towel was used at a wedding, when parents blessed their children. Nowadays, this towel is preserved and passed on from generation to generation as a family heirloom.

Established modern traditions

What should you say next to the groom and the matchmakers at the matchmaking ceremony? During dinner, in order to break up the official conversation, they sometimes arrange comic checks on the bride and groom. Matchmakers on the groom's side ask the bride questions, not without humor, regarding her housekeeping. The bride should respond in the same manner. The bride's parents then "torture" the groom. Jokes and shared laughter bring future relatives closer together, establishing warm relationships between them.

Speaking about how matchmaking takes place in our time, it is necessary to mention that it often happens that both parties have known each other for a long time, but still, honoring Slavic traditions, they decided to conduct a matchmaking ceremony. In this case, families resolve issues related to the preparation and holding of the wedding celebration: they set a date, distribute responsibilities, discuss the menu, the location of the banquet, etc.

Of course, the modern groom must ensure that the joyful moments are captured on a photo or video camera. The first photographs of the official future family will become living memories of that happy day.

Matchmaking is, in essence, the official consent of the bride and groom, as well as their families, to enter into marriage. There is no universal scenario or rules for performing this ritual, since even in ancient times, matchmaking traditions differed greatly not only in different countries, but also in different regions of Rus'. In this article we will look at the main features, current echoes of past traditions and interesting ideas regarding matchmaking.

Matchmaking today

Modern matchmaking in most cases is simple and prosaic, especially in urban areas. Matchmakers, whose roles are most often played by the groom's closest relatives, rarely burden themselves with learning long poems and theatrical performances (except for the common phrase: “you have a product, we have a merchant”). However, certain etiquette is still observed. So, upon arrival at the bride’s house, the groom always gives the women flowers (if the future wife has grandmothers or sisters, they will also be pleased to receive a bouquet along with the bride and her mother). Matchmakers bring gifts with them, most often these are: sweets, fruit baskets, alcohol. In addition, the groom (or his mother) can give the bride some expensive gift, for example, jewelry or something significant for his family. Some special gifts can be presented to the bride's parents. It is better to discuss what to give to your future father-in-law and mother-in-law in advance with the bride - she probably knows their preferences. Alternatively, it could be: a talisman for the home, a photo album (with a promise to fill it soon with photographs of grandchildren), a beautiful carved candle (as a symbol of light and warmth), etc. After the welcoming speeches, everyone goes to the table, where they discuss in detail the subject of the meeting - the wedding of the newlyweds.

What words to say during matchmaking

While the bride's relatives can act impromptu, the groom's matchmakers will have to prepare some kind of opening speech. The essence of this speech usually boils down to the following: we know that a beautiful girl lives here, we have a smart/generous/wealthy groom for her, who, moreover, is endlessly in love with her, do you agree to put her in his reliable hands ? This traditional preamble can be formulated in either prose or verse. Here are some short poetic options:

We brought you a great guy!
The merchant is excellent for your product!
Dressed to the nines - looks decent,
There is a corner and personal transport.
There is money - not poor,
The character is easy - the disposition is not harmful.
How's it going with your fiancee?
Are you ready for marriage yet?

We came to your house for a reason.
One dream brought us -
Give your child to a happy marriage,
Hurry up and hug your grandchildren.
And if our thoughts are similar,
Let's put everything aside
To discuss the wedding together
And fortunately, the way is open to children.

You have one girl:
Modest, beautiful, young
We have a groom to match her:
He also has the intelligence to become.
We offer in one thread
Connect their two destinies.

Hello, nice family!
Meet a prominent man.
We will immediately say not the same -
He's a nice groom, right up his alley!
And lead you to the altar
He wants your girl.

We were lucky to know -
Your product is expensive.
Good in everything, give or take.
Our merchant is golden.
Just look for something like this!
Handsome, smart, daring.
He'll make a great husband and son-in-law!
So give us a straight answer -
Are you ready to give away the goods?

We have come to your glorious home
With a first class groom!
Give it some time -
We'll tell you everything about it.

Scenarios of modern matchmaking

We will not present matchmaking scenarios in verse (there are quite a few of them on the Internet). Let us note only the key stages of this ritual. It all starts with the opening speech of the matchmakers (mentioned above). Further, matchmakers may ask the bride to perform a number of comic tasks to ensure that she will be a thrifty wife. For example, answer the following questions:

What kind of water will you pour over instant noodles for your husband: hot or warm? (The correct answer is none, I will feed him delicious, homemade food);
- When you wash a pan, do you scrub more inside or outside? (The correct answer is that I wash equally well on all sides);
- At what temperature will you wash woolen items? (The correct answer is slightly warm so as not to shrink);
- List the ingredients from which you will cook borscht.
etc.

The bride's relatives, in turn, can prepare a number of tasks or questions for the groom. For example:

The groom is asked to choose a city: Arkhangelsk, Yaroslavl or Khabarovsk (these are the cities depicted on banknotes of 500, 1000 and 5000 rubles). After this, you can joke about the future earnings of the groom - praise him or, on the contrary, advise him to try harder.
- Ask him to hammer a nail into a board, but give him a nail with a bent leg, explaining that in family life not everything is so simple and he will need to be able to cope with various difficulties.
- To check how safe it will be for the bride to travel with the groom in the car, you can ask a series of car questions about traffic rules or ask to decipher some rare signs.
- Answer a number of “male” questions. What tool is used to make a hole in a concrete wall (perforator)? How can you cut the wire with pliers or pliers (pliers)? And so on.

At some point, the hosts invite guests to the table. There, both families finally shake hands and begin to substantively discuss the wedding and the future life of the young people. In villages, this joint feast is called “binge” (not to be confused with binge drinking in the well-known sense).

An important stage of matchmaking is the formal appeal of the groom to the bride's parents with a request to give their daughter in marriage to him. When this should be done (at the very beginning or during the feast) is not so important. And here there is no room for jokes and antics - this symbolic moment requires the most serious attitude.

Matchmaking traditions that have survived to this day

The ancient Slavs had a great variety of traditions and superstitions associated with matchmaking, some of which have successfully survived to this day. Whether to use them or not is up to you, but if there are elderly people in the family who are often supporters of “this is the way it is,” it may be worth including something from the following in the “event” program.

Particular importance in wedding rituals, including matchmaking, was given to the loaf. This tradition dates back to pagan times. The shape and color of the loaf symbolized the sun, and the Sun God was especially revered by the Slavs. Matchmakers always brought a loaf of bread with them to matchmaking. The bride had to cut it at the table and distribute it to everyone present as a sign of consent to the marriage; first, the parents were treated to it. For a marriage to be successful, every last bite had to be eaten. At modern matchmaking, a loaf is also often present. If you do not have the opportunity to purchase a real loaf, you can simply buy round bread (a salt shaker is not necessary).

The second traditional thing was the towel. Different Slavic peoples used towels in different ways during matchmaking: as gifts from the bride to future relatives, they were tied on the matchmakers’ chests as a sign of consent, they were tied to the matchmaker’s hands, etc. Today you can simply present the loaf on a towel, and then put it in a safe place - it can be used later when blessing your parents and other rituals. An item with such a symbolic history will certainly become a family heirloom in the future.

Previously, during matchmaking, the bride never went out to meet the matchmakers. Until a certain point, she was in a locked room. This rule can be followed today - you must agree, there is some intrigue in this.

Even if the groom satisfied the bride's parents in everything, they never gave their consent from the threshold. The rules of decency required them to bide their time and “raise the price” for their goods. Perhaps, similar behavior would be useful today, so that it doesn’t turn out like in that joke when the wife instructed her husband before the groom’s arrival:
- Vasya, just don’t immediately throw yourself on his neck with the words “You are our Savior!”

After the bride appeared in front of the guests, the stage of the so-called bridegroom began. The bride was asked to walk around, do some simple actions, and pour tea for everyone. This was necessary to identify the girl’s physical flaws. Today, of course, times are different and matchmakers have most likely seen the groom’s chosen one more than once. However, the bride should be active at the table and take care of the guests - this will earn the respect of future relatives.

Having given his consent to the marriage, the bride's father placed his daughter's hand in the hand of the future husband and spoke parting words. He asked the groom to protect and take care of the bride. This sentimental moment can easily be recreated today. Perhaps this will make the groom feel additional responsibility as he enters a new stage of his life.

1. You can ask one of your relatives to film the matchmaking with a camera or video camera. Often such things are thought about too late, and the family archive is deprived of valuable personnel.

2. Take the time and bake something for the holiday table with your own hands. Homemade baking helps create a warm family environment.

3. Prepare a couple of interesting toasts on the topic of matchmaking in advance. There are many humorous and quite serious, touching options on the Internet.

Several video examples of matchmaking from the Internet

The tradition of matchmaking came to us from our ancestors. This is a very interesting and unusual pre-wedding ceremony that has many rules. On it, the families of the newlyweds get to know each other and agree on the wedding.

For everything to go well, you should draw up a script for the event in advance. It can be modern, with lots of cool ideas. Or traditional. It all depends on the personal preferences of each family. You can watch a video that will tell you how best to cope with the upcoming task. It is customary to conduct matchmaking at home, in a family environment.

Make a menu, the table should be rich. Prepare a variety of dishes so that the groom's relatives can enjoy the treat. It is traditional to meet matchmakers with a loaf of bread and salt. To create a good mood, you can turn on music and organize dancing. The modern scenario in this regard is no different from that adopted by our ancestors.

According to tradition, the groom must give a bouquet of flowers to the bride and her mother. There is no need to give large and expensive gifts to the bride's family; it is enough to limit yourself to fruits and sweets. Traditionally, the groom's family should prepare the loaf. But if you want to please future relatives, here is a list of possible gifts for a woman:

  • Silk scarf or warm shawl.
  • Expensive perfume. But you should not give preference to this gift if you do not know about the preferences of the person to whom you plan to give it.
  • Book. This could be a collector's edition that will delight a literature fan.
  • Home decor: figurine, vase, photo frame.

What suits a man:

  • Wine, elite cognac and other alcoholic drinks.
  • If a person smokes, buy expensive cigarettes for him.
  • Tools for the home.
  • Technique.
  • Car accessory.

Gifts should be practical. You should not spend a lot of money if you are not entirely sure that your gift will please the person.

Dowry

Accepted at matchmaking negotiate the dowry amount. In Rus', collecting a dowry traditionally began long before the wedding. It usually includes dishes, towels, and bed linen. You can buy household appliances if your budget allows. These items will be useful to the bride and groom in their future life together.

A correctly drawn up script guarantees a successful celebration and will bring a lot of pleasant emotions, which is why it is so important to pay attention to it. Here are the main stages of the event.

  1. The matchmakers arrive at the bride's house. They are greeted with songs and ditties.
  2. Relatives get to know each other. The groom gives the gifts he brought and treats his betrothed's parents to a loaf of bread.
  3. After introductions, guests are invited to a set table.
  4. The bride comes out to the guests, whose parents describe her positive qualities, praising their daughter in every possible way.
  5. At this stage, it is customary for the groom to confess his feelings to the bride and give her a ring.
  6. If the bride's parents agree to the marriage, then the matchmaking can be completed with fireworks and dancing.

The arrival of matchmakers agreed in advance by both parties. There are favorable and unfavorable days. Numbers three, five, seven and nine bring happiness and good luck. Try to invite guests on one of these days. It is not advisable to conduct matchmaking on Maslenitsa. Also try to avoid the thirteenth.

Matchmakers should be greeted cordially so that they feel the comfort and hospitality of your home. The bride comes out to the guests only after they sit down at the table. Her relatives should praise her. It would be appropriate to make a toast to the happiness of the young. As a rule, it is pronounced by the oldest and most respected member of the family. The toast can be prepared in advance so as not to get confused at the event.

In turn, the groom must prepare your speech in advance, in which he confesses his love for the bride and demonstrates his feelings. After confession, he must solemnly ask for the hand of his chosen one from her parents. Having received a blessing from the elders, the matchmakers take the young couple to the center of the room and join their hands. The groom puts a ring on the bride's finger. It is believed that it should be decorated with a precious stone. If you believe in the energy that stones possess, then first read about their properties. Try to choose a light-colored and not very bulky stone.

Matchmaking in Kuban is noisy and fun. It is no different from the holiday in other regions of Russia. But it is worth taking into account the traditions of each nation, which may differ from each other. The modern scenario may be different from the traditional one. The most important thing is to have fun and be happy for the happiness of the young people.

Matchmaking on the part of the bride, what to tell relatives, what to ask the groom's family? Let's answer this question. Don't ask too many questions, as this can confuse the young man and his family.

Write down possible topics for conversation in the script in advance. This is necessary so that there are no awkward pauses at the table. Below is a list of topics and questions that can be addressed:

  • future plans;
  • the groom's thoughts on what an ideal marriage should be like;
  • Favorite activities in free time: hobbies and interests.

Do not touch upon financial or personal issues in the conversation. Remember that the conversation should take place in open, friendly atmosphere.

The groom's side can also talk to the bride. During the conversation, she should behave quietly and modestly. You cannot interrupt your elders or raise your intonation. On this day it is important to make a good impression on future relatives.

Competitions for guests

We wrote above that the scenario can be quite unusual. Some families organize funny competitions, which we will discuss below.

  1. To conduct this competition, you should write in advance on small pieces of paper the various activities that the husband and wife will do after the wedding. For example: swimming with dolphins, drawing on the asphalt, going to the solarium together. Guests take turns taking them out and discussing the answers together. The more unusual they are, the more fun the competition will be. Show your imagination!
  2. Guests should remember and sing wedding songs. You can prepare a small gift for the winner in advance. Music brings people together and is a great way to lift your spirits.
  3. Make your parents happy by organizing a competition for them. Find out the history of their acquaintance in advance and ask questions related to it. This will put all guests in a romantic mood and create an atmosphere of love and warmth.

Folk signs

Not only in ancient Rus' people believed in omens. We very often pay attention to various signs and try to interpret their meaning. Below we present the main signs associated with the tradition of matchmaking.

  • If you meet a man early in the morning, this is a sign that the matchmaking will be successful.
  • Giving alms to the needy is encouraged among the people. If you want to receive God's blessing, give money or food to those in need.
  • If on the day of matchmaking a spoon or fork falls, it means your guests are rushing to your house.

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