Love and science

For many years, world scientists have been trying to figure out what makes women fall in love with men and vice versa. There are few conclusions, they are short and known to all of us. Men by nature prefer to love with their eyes, and women with their ears. These are not just words - it is really backed by science. Scientists also say that we fall in love not under the influence of a fleeting impulse, but out of necessity. We subconsciously find the person who will most contribute to the continuation of our kind. But recently new surprising facts have been revealed. Scientists have proven that love actually exists!

As a result of research by American psychologists, it was proved that our brain contains separate zones responsible for love experiences. And when a loved one thinks about us, sees us, communicates, these zones become very active. Moreover, these zones “clog” the work of other important zones. For example, a zone responsible for critical understanding of reality, social assessment and anger. Therefore, if your loved one walks with a constant smile on his face, then he has not gone crazy, he just truly loves you. Just for what?

Love and the subconscious

No one wants to believe that we are loved only because of the action of pheromones. But this is largely true. These are substances that are produced together with the release of sweat and on a subconscious level attract a sexual partner. Pheromones act indiscriminately, we can not always explain the principle of their "work". That is why “good” girls sometimes choose “bad” guys, or outwardly unattractive ones fall in love with beauties, and at the same time their feelings are mutual. We often explain this attachment of dissimilar people in our own way: opposites attract. This is not entirely true in essence, but the result is very similar to the truth. Two people who are similar in everything can easily get bored together. On this basis, conflicts can often arise. And yet, if two people have a similar temperament, then it is not easy for them to live in a family. If both are passive, then there is no one to make decisions, things simply remain unresolved, problems accumulate like a snowball. If both partners are leaders, then the situation is also not easy. Everyone will strive for leadership, will not yield in resolving issues, will not tolerate disobedience.

Sometimes you can, in order to save yourself from questions, come up and ask your loved one directly why he loves you. That's just the answer is usually not enough for us. Most likely, the partner will begin to list individual external traits or character traits. For example, your boyfriend may say: “You are so beautiful, funny, not like everyone else, etc.”. An older man, if he thinks to say something, then something like: "You are caring, sexy, affectionate, original, etc." Note that this will be an ordinary "standard" set of those qualities that attract men in women, and women in men.

Sometimes such an answer will indeed be more like a template than a plausible one. But on a subconscious level, we are loved for a completely different reason. For example, a girl suddenly fell in love with a man twice her age. Why did it happen? He can be perfect in any way, but in general this happened only because the girl grew up without a father and subconsciously searched for a man who could be her support, protection, who would educate her due to her greater life experience. On the other hand, it may be that the girl had a father, but relations with him did not develop. This further influences the choice of a partner older than himself.

It happens that a person is initially inclined to suffer and arouse pity for himself. He chooses a despotic partner who will constantly humiliate and suppress him. That is why certain types of women can steadfastly endure the beatings and betrayals of their husbands, or a man can choose women who are powerful and selfish, being subsequently “under their thumb”. At the same time, they all sincerely love each other.

Love and "self-hypnosis"

In childhood, we all somehow figuratively represented our other half. Moreover, sometimes, closing our eyes, we have already clearly seen how they love us, how they take care of us, we see in detail our ideal wedding, we dream of having children. It is believed that it is precisely those women who were able to create a clear model (necessarily positive) of their adult life from childhood, in the future they receive just such a life. It has been proven that love can be inspired. We so inspire ourselves with our future ideal feeling that it is literally attracted to us over the years. True, sometimes the details do not match, but the essence remains unchanged. Such women are always happy in marriage; in such families, partners love each other selflessly.

It also happens, for example, when a girl has dreamed all her life of meeting a rich man who, in a fit of love, will shower her with precious gifts, fashionable clothes, and go on a trip around the world with her. Growing up, she meets such a person on the way. He is decent, a businessman and not greedy at all. So, she will definitely fall in love. It is already clear what will be the main advantage of a man for such a girl. However, one should not immediately condemn her for selfishness. As a man, she will love him madly, for real. Because such is the power of her self-hypnosis. True, if it were not for his financial situation, he simply would not fit her “childish standard”. Such a man would not become wise, gallant and attentive for her, because he would not have the original basic quality.

We often say: "Love is evil ...". However, love is not as irrational as it seems - people love each other for a reason. Everything can, if desired, find its own explanation. True, why? It is better to love without looking back and with an open heart.

During the communication of two people, channels are formed between their auras, through which energy flows flow in both directions. If people like each other, then an intense energy exchange takes place between them. And there are spiritual connections. They can affect a person both positively and negatively.

Bound souls

The more partners are passionate about each other, the more strong and active channels (soul connections) are formed. It is in this way that strong relationships arise that are not subject to either distance or time. For example, a mother always feels her child, no matter where he is, and no matter how many years have passed since their last meeting.

It also happens that when meeting an old acquaintance after many years, a person feels as if they parted only yesterday. Channels can persist for a very long time - years and even decades. That is, channels connect not only bodies, but also souls.

Healthy relationships form bright, clear, pulsating channels. In such relationships there is trust, intimacy, sincerity and there is enough room for personal freedom. There is an equal exchange of energy, without distortions.

Broken hearts

If the relationship is unhealthy, that is, one partner depends on the other, then the channels are heavy, stagnant, dull. Such relationships deprive of freedom, often come down to mutual irritation and anger. If one of the partners wants to completely control the other, connections, like ropes, can wrap around the aura from all sides.

When relationships gradually die, the channels become thinner and weaker. Over time, the energy stops running through these channels, communication stops, people become strangers. If people part, but the channels are still preserved, then they continue to reach out to each other. It also happens when one partner breaks off spiritual ties and closes off from further interaction, while the other partner is still attached to him and is trying in every possible way to break through energy protection in order to restore relations.

In the process of forcible rupture of channels, parting is very painful. It takes many months or years to recover from this. Much here depends on how ready a person is to accept the free will of another and free himself from dependence developed over a long time. It's difficult, but possible.

The soul remembers the partner

Most of the channels built in everyday communication eventually disappear without a trace. In the case of close relationships, the channels persist for a very long time, even after parting. Particularly strong channels arise during sexual and family ties.

Every time you have sexual contact with a new partner, new spiritual ties are formed that hold people together for many years, and even the rest of their lives. At the same time, it does not matter at all whether the sexual partners managed to find out each other's names - the connection in the case of sexual contact is formed and lasts for a very long time. And if there is a channel, then there is also the circulation of energy through it. And what quality the energy comes in is already difficult to say, it depends on the characteristics of the other person. If he is completely negative, then the “fastened” partner will feel oppressed and not understand what is wrong.

For people who live nearby for a long time, the energy fields adjust to each other and work in unison. Intimate relationships require field synchronization. Often we notice that people who live together for a long time become similar to each other even outwardly.

Repulsive emotions

If the characteristics of the auras of two individuals differ greatly, then it will be difficult for them to communicate. When the field is invaded by energy flows that are alien to it, a reaction of repulsion, fear, disgust appears - "I'm sick of him."

When a person does not want to communicate with someone, he closes his energy field, and all energy flows emanating from another person are reflected. In this case, the other person gets the impression that he is not heard, as if he is talking to the wall.

Each person has the right to enter into or not to enter into energy interaction with the world around him, but it is impossible to completely refuse these contacts. People are accustomed to dividing the world into "bad" and "good", attracting the good and repelling the bad. What can you do - these are the properties of our spiritual world. But times are changing, and now the world is striving for unity, the merging of all sides, facets of the world into one whole.

We must respect the right of individuality and the acquisition of different experiences in each of the people. But remember that any connection has consequences. And what they will be - everyone is free to choose for himself.

On the one hand, you can see a lot of happy and loving couples, but it’s not clear, because you need to continue to love and be together. There are many reasons for this, but you need to know the most basic reasons for breaking up so as not to fall into the same situation.

In the article, psychologists will tell you about why do people break up when they love each other, how to prevent this in your family or relationships. After all, outwardly we see happy couples, but internally we understand that soon these people will part.

'Cause love isn't real

Not everyone understands what love is and, accordingly, believe that if people are together, then they love each other. Today it is rare to see people who are truly in love and this is a big problem. People have not learned to take care of what they have and have begun to invent the illusion of love, creating it even on the Internet. The reason why people break up when they love each other is because they don't really love and didn't love each other.

Because there are no common interests

Main reason, why do people break up that there are no common interests and outlooks on life. These people just meet and they don’t even have anything to talk about with each other. Because of this, they part, not even trying to find at least something in common, which can definitely be found in every person, there would be a desire. Find out: how to find a worthy husband, as women are looking for a real man, but they themselves do not want to become real women.

They do not understand the meaning of further relationships

Often all relationships are created on emotions and when a couple begins to think logically, they do not find the meaning of further relationships and this is the reason why people break up when they love each other, because their love was just affection.

Changed interests

It happens that people meet for a long time, but with age their interests and outlook on life change and they need something different in life. Disagreements begin in interests and as a result, people part. But if there was a desire, it would be possible to stay together and form new common interests.

People rush to create relationships

Especially today's youth, constantly somewhere in a hurry and trying to try everything. Here why do people break up when they love each other, as they confuse falling in love, affection with true love. True love will never allow people to break up and betray each other, and this is a problem, since few people truly love. Do not rush to build a serious relationship, make friends and walk together for at least 1-2 years. Then it will become clear whether you need each other spiritually or not.

Betrayal, betrayal

The main reason why people break up when they love each other is, of course, betrayal and betrayal in a relationship or family. People do not love each other and seek pleasure in other people, hiding it. When the truth becomes reality, the couple is disappointed and breaks up. After all, it makes no sense to live with someone who changes and gives.

Love disappears

Many consider the reason why people break up when they love each other, then that love is gone and gone. This does not happen, love cannot pass, because true love always exists and will be in our hearts, we just do not want to feel it, and we continue to create artificial love for ourselves and believe in it. For this reason, not only couples break up, but also families within three years of marriage. Find out: How to get to know a guy to create a truly lasting relationship for life.

The main thing is not to rush to create a family and relationships, because no one bothers you just for the first time to be friends and meet. And when you realize that you love, then after three years, you can create a serious relationship and family. And if there are no feelings, then you will simply remain friends, and you will not suffer like many because of what was not there, because of affection, and not because of love.

Keep love always in your heart and then you will never stop loving and love that person who really loves you and wants to be with you all his life.

This question can be rephrased. Why, or, better to say, why does a person take food every day? The answer is simple - in order to live. With food, the body receives all the substances necessary for life, vitamins and trace elements, and hence energy. Love is the same energy, the same food, the same daily food, but only for the soul.

Why does a person need love?

The soul lives, develops, creates, grows only thanks to love, just like our arms, legs move, the heart beats, the blood constantly moves in a circle, and the brain functions only thanks to nutrition. It is not difficult to imagine what can happen if a person stops eating and drinking. Decline in strength, illness and - ultimately - inevitable death. And what can happen if a person stops loving a person?

World of mind and body

She once said that in our troubled world there are many people who die of hunger, but even more of those whose heart stops from lack of love. Indeed, from a lack of love, from the impossibility or inability to love a person, inevitable hunger sets in, the soul gets sick, gradually exhausted and leaves this world. People who perceive the world literally, accepting as truth only what can be seen with one's own eyes, what is easy to feel, hear or touch, will be skeptical about this statement. Well, let ... Soul, faith, love - this is something that cannot be touched and unimaginable to see, but this is what, in fact, is primary, which determines and creates the most tangible reality. However, even believers call this a miracle ...

And again about love...

Androgynous

Plato in the dialogue "Feast" tells the legend of the once-existing creatures - androgynes, combining both male and female principles. Like the Titans, they were proud of their perfection - unprecedented strength and exceptional beauty, they challenged the gods. The gods got angry... And as a punishment they divided the androgynes into two halves - a man and a woman. Cut in two, they could not find peace for themselves, they lived in constant search for each other. A fairy tale, but in it a hint why a person loves a person. Love is a constant pursuit of wholeness. However, here too there is a certain paradoxical pattern - having found our soul mate, we merge in a close embrace, with every breath, every cell feeling the harmony of unity, even a certain solidity - “one-single-whole-indivisible-eternal”, we again strive for chaos - to the loss of each other, so that our soul again plunges into torment, torment, suffering for the lost and gathers on a new journey to love.

At first glance, it seems that this is a vicious circle, meaningless and merciless. But back to the myth of the Anrogyns. Having become one, they fell into pride - narcissism and self-praise, which only leads to decline and degradation, and therefore to a complete stop and disappearance of the continuity and infinity of life. Heaven is barren and meaningless without hell, good without evil, life without death. Each time, setting off on a new journey to love, we learn a new facet, a new law of love, we give one more of the endless number of answers why a person loves a person, thereby communicating a new super-powerful energy for the work of the perpetual motion machine of life.

One feeling for life

The world is infinite in its diversity, just like love. A person can love one person all his life, parting, finding each other renewed, betraying, forgiving, living under one roof or, conversely, all his life at a distance from each other, and thereby coming to love, to harmony through the soul of one person. In our minds there is an image of ideal love, one for life. We dream about it, strive for it, and even the most callous cynics carefully keep this bright picture from the cover of a magazine under their pillows so that no one will ever guess or even dare to think what is really going on in their souls. Where this idea of ​​love came from, whether it is true or a utopia, is unknown.

Lost heaven

I repeat - we all strive for the ideal, for the search for the second half, which was originally given to us by the gods, for becoming perfection again - anrogyn. One part of us believes in the absolute without any doubts, and the other part offers to check it. And, probably, swinging the scales in one direction or the other is what we need - the process of knowing love. After all, it is not the final goal, not the moment of balancing, not the moment of unification, but the path itself that is important. What will it be like, with whom we will unexpectedly run into around the corner, whom we will meet, whom we will take a glimpse of, and who will make us suddenly and at once look intently into the eyes of another, whom we will invite for tea, and whom we will not even let on the threshold ... And why in we will come as a result - this is the answer to the question why a person loves a person, which, in fact, is a great mystery.

People who don't know how to love...

Looking at an iceberg floating in the ocean, it is impossible to guess or guess what it really is.

The tip of the iceberg is what a person demonstrates to others, and sometimes to himself - it's easier not to ask questions. But what is really hidden under the dark water surface? Soul, self-love, love for people, faith, talents… A lot of things. Do not measure, do not weigh, do not get to the very bottom. As Mikhail Epstein said, love is such a long business, for which one life is negligible, so get ready to spend eternity with it. Thus, any of our assumptions, whether this or that person is capable of love, or not, is an illusion. And if we take as a basis the concept of "soul" - the divine essence of man - then the assumption of such a thought is completely impossible ...

How to understand that you love a person ...

Francois La Rochefoucauld once remarked that there is only one love, but there are thousands of its fakes... The great French writer, of course, is fair, but at the same time not. Imagine love as a school. There are primary, middle and senior classes… First-graders learn to write, hold their hands correctly, draw sticks, circles…. Further - more: numbers, addition, subtraction, multiplication table, equations, trigonometry. Each new stage in learning is impossible without the previous one. You can't jump from first class to fifth. However, often a high school student, looking back, perceives all the previous steps, all his sufferings, torments, or victories as funny, ridiculous, even stupid. How could he not solve the “2 + 2” example, forgetting that today's day has come only thanks to past mistakes and achievements.

All of this applies to love as well. Each person, each soul is at its own stage of development, at its own level of knowledge, in a certain class. And it is not always determined by age. For one, a bright passion is love. For others, love. The third is ready to break on the edge of a bottomless abyss. And the fourth seeks clarity and tranquility in love... And each of them is right and at the same time wrong. What a person feels at the moment is his truth, one more step towards the truth. Therefore, you just need to listen to your heart and follow only it. It is the best teacher and helper. And the question of how to understand that you love a person disappears by itself. By asking it, we do not seek to understand ourselves, but fear their consequences. We kind of ask if I can fall in love ... But in fact, no one can forbid loving or not loving, and nothing will save you from possible mistakes. If feelings appeared, albeit immature, albeit naive and shallow, it means that they are needed for something and do not need either explanation or confirmation, and especially from the outside. The words of M. McLaughlin, that to someone who falls in love for the first time, it seems that he knows everything that needs to be known about life - and, perhaps, he is right - the best confirmation of this.

great secret

Neil Donald Walsh has a wonderful parable about a Little Soul who once came to God and asked him to help her become who she really is. God was surprised at such a request, because she already knows her essence, realizes herself as who she really is. However, knowing and feeling, feeling are completely different things. Well, it's said and done, and God brought another of His creatures to her - a Friendly Soul. She agreed to help her. In their next earthly incarnation, the Friendly Soul will pretend to be bad, lower its vibrations, become heavy and do some terrible deed, and then the Little Soul will be able to manifest its essence, become what it was originally born to be - forgiving, infinite love and all-encompassing light. The little soul was surprised and very worried about the fate of the helper. But the Friendly Soul assured her that nothing terrible would happen. Everything that happens in life happens only because of and in the name of Love.

All souls through the ages and across distances dance this dance. Each of them was both up and down, and right, and left, and good, and cynical evil, victim and torturer, and there is only one answer to everything that exists - people meet each other to show themselves and know love. So it is impossible to fully understand why people love each other, why we love some and neglect others, why we are ready to put up with the most disgusting qualities of one person, but unable to forgive the little to another, why love often becomes synonymous with causeless bouts of despair, mental torment and disappointment. Rather, we can guess about some unwritten laws of the universe, try to penetrate, see what is hidden behind the front side, what is the wrong side ... However, making efforts, trying and trying is all we are capable of. All our attempts are ultimately doomed to failure. Why? Yes, because we are not allowed to touch the bottom with our hands, and we do not need to. This is not our task. God is the creator of everything. We are only invited to live, feel, experience, feel and be filled ...

Conclusion

What more can be said? American poetess, offered her own version: “Love is everything. And that’s all we know about her…” It’s hard to disagree, because as soon as it seems to us that all the lessons have been passed, that all the laws have been studied, and the theorems have been proven, some unknown, but superpowerful force offers us new events, unfamiliar feelings and experiences. And we, diving with our heads, realize how big this ocean is and how small and insignificant we are in comparison with it.