What if a married woman is in love with another man? Go towards your Love for a bad man or save your family to the detriment of your feelings?

If a new feeling blossomed in the soul, it means that something was missing in the woman’s previous life. Perhaps vivid impressions and thrills, or maybe feelings of security, stability, confidence in the future and fidelity of the spouse, in his tenderness and love. It is important to understand - what exactly was missing for you?

A woman should find the strength in herself to honestly answer this question: if, before the emergence of a new feeling for another man, your family life suited you, you were happy with your husband and dreamed of living with him all your life, and now you have nothing to reproach him for, you still respect him - do not rush to ruin such a gift of fate.

Feelings pass with time, the novelty and madness of passion disappears, and only misunderstanding remains - why did you cause so much pain to your husband, the person with whom you raised children together and who took care of you? Do not destroy the family, but just enjoy your love. Platonic or not - it's up to you, but don't think that cheating is immoral.

Honesty in this case is possible only at the expense of your loved ones, do not force them to pay for your principles. Passion will pass, and you will again have to build relationships in a new family, with new relatives, help establish mutual understanding between your chosen one and children, and possibly share the property acquired in marriage in parallel. Are you ready for this?

Often women also suffer from the lack of good sex in the marital bed, and banal sexual dissatisfaction pushes them to look for them.

Here, too, it is important to be honest with yourself: is there anything other than great sex that connects you with your new lover? And do you need it outside the bedroom? Are you interested in talking to him? Are you ready to spend your time on solving his problems? Does he strive to make your life better not only in bed?

If you are in doubt, do not rush to make a final decision, let your feelings cool down at least a little, because this is inevitable, and only after that compare again, and then seven more times with your men. And choose the one who is truly dear to you, to whom both the soul and the body aspire.

But if your family life has long brought you more grief than joy, then maybe a new love is a hint of fate that the time has come to change your life dramatically.

The role of a victim of debt does not suit you at all!

In the biographies of great people, there are often stories when wives sacrificed their feelings in order to save the family, considering it their duty, and their husbands soon abandoned them for other women. Who is pleased to live with a woman for whom being near is a burdensome duty.

Many consider it necessary not to give vent to feelings if the spouses have children. But do children really need such sacrifices and are they so useful for them? There are, of course, situations when a child is very attached to his father, and separation from him will indeed become a strong psychological trauma. But how many women continue to live next to men who have not shown themselves brightly either as a husband or as a father. And why should they miss their chance for happiness?

The only thing worth warning women with children leaving is the thought that if she fell in love with a man, her children will love him too. This is often not the case, so be prepared for the fact that you will have to work hard and be patient to teach your loved ones to live without conflict and respect each other. Do not expose your feelings in front of children, pay more attention to them and find time to be alone with them.

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Relationship with an unfree woman and the reasons for its occurrence. The article will give recommendations on how to get out of the love triangle, which has become problematic for the existing couple outside of marriage.

The content of the article:

Relations with a married woman are far from a rare case that is no longer able to shock society. Each of us has the right to decide how his intimate communication with the sexual object he likes will develop. However, with the intervention of a third person in an already existing couple, one should clearly understand for oneself all the prospects of the alleged extramarital affair.

Reasons for a relationship between a man and a married woman

In this case, it is necessary to consider both options, when both the representative of the stronger sex and the lady in marriage can become the initiators of the start of secret meetings. Such a distinction must be made in order to show the difference in the perception of the situation by different people.

Motives for relationships with a married man

When studying this issue, it is worth considering the fact that the representatives of the stronger sex react somewhat differently to the possibility of starting an affair with a not free lady.

The reasons for the relationship of a man with a married woman, as life experience shows, may lie in the following factors:

• No commitment. It is no secret to anyone that this aspect very often pushes adventurers into an easy relationship. Men with a similar behavior model do not want to enter into a relationship, which in the future may become a problem for them. A married woman is an ideal option for them to have a great time without any obligations.
• Bad experiences in the past. Some "cuckolds" after a divorce begin to comprehend the events in their lives in a different way. If in the past the representative of the stronger sex was deceived by his wife, then there can be no question of any male solidarity in the future. A person with such an unfortunate history can consciously take revenge on other people, destroying other people's families.
• . Not only free women are able to light a flame in the heart of a man. Very often, it is mutual sympathy that becomes the main reason for the development of extramarital relationships. A man in love does not care much in this case, the stamp in the passport of the lady who liked it.
• Collecting women. Such don Juans do not care what status the sexual object they like is in. The fact that a woman has children and is quite happy in marriage will not stop them either. For such womanizers, the main thing is to seduce a bastion that is difficult to give in, in order to once again be convinced of their own irresistibility.

Important! Whatever the reason for the intervention of a third party in a married couple, one should be aware of the possible consequences of such actions. It is very easy to destroy other people's relationships if they initially cracked. However, you should be aware of the boomerang effect, which works quite often.

Reasons for bonding with married women

The fair sex has a slightly different attitude to this issue, which their partners do not always understand. According to psychological research, women sometimes do unexpected things in relation to their family for the following reasons:

1. Revenge on a cheating husband. Very often, victims of betrayal try to amuse their wounded pride in this way. The wedge-wedge option is not always a conscious decision, because in most cases a woman intuitively wants to punish the traitor. Trying to protect themselves from negative information, the ladies begin to look for adventures on the side in order to amuse their wounded pride.
2. Dissatisfaction with family life. Everyday life can sometimes destroy even the strongest relationships if they have not stood the test of time. Every woman wants to be loved and desired, therefore, in the absence of a proper attitude towards her from her husband, she begins to look at other men with interest.
3. Raising self-esteem. Not every person is confident in his abilities when it comes to his relationship with the opposite sex. If a husband constantly humiliates his wife, then she will begin to seek recognition of her attractiveness with another sexual partner.
4. . Even the most ardent passion tends to burn out over time. It is very important for a woman to feel in demand, so she can get herself a free man as a lover. In this case, much depends on the upbringing of the lady and her temperament, because some of the fair sex, even in the absence of love, are afraid of communication with a partner outside of marriage.

The expediency of relations with a married woman

Before starting an affair with an unfree lady, it is necessary to foresee those moments that can occur during such an affair. The behavior of a man in a relationship with a married woman cannot be the same as when flirting with a girl out of wedlock.

Benefits of dating an unfree lady

Many life situations have two sides of the coin, which is repeatedly confirmed by the statistics of love relationships.

Men see the positive aspects of such secret dates in the following factors:

• Indispensability of marriage. If it is not about high and pure love, then a married anemone will not demand to legitimize relations with a partner on the side. She does not need it, because she already has the status of a family man.
• The unobtrusiveness of an unfree woman. Conspiracy is primarily important for a traitor, so she is unlikely to pursue her lover who is free from bonds. Therefore, you can safely enjoy an easy relationship with a partner you like, without fear of any claims from her.
• . In most cases, unfree women are accustomed to regular sexual relations. Consequently, their intimate knowledge may be much greater than that of their unmarried competitors.
• Easy parting. Initially, in such a relationship, no one gives loud oaths to anyone, because such a relationship is based on betrayal of the legal spouse. If you want to end the secret romance, you can simply tell the unfree partner that she needs to return to the family.

Note! A man in any case has more opportunities to have a great time with a married woman without any difficulties for himself. He risks almost nothing if the connection with her does not become known to the public.

Disadvantages of a relationship with a married woman

For all the seeming simplicity of such an intimate adventure, there are also pitfalls of such a novel:

1. Possible exposure. When asked whether it is worth starting a relationship with a married woman, you need to remember this factor. Not every husband will adequately perceive the information that he has become a "cuckold". In some cases, he will want to deal with the offender not only with the help of a verbal battle, but also using physical force.
2. Problems in creating a family. If a man wants to have children and a faithful wife, then the option of a married woman is not for him. It is not a fact that the windy young lady wants to leave her soulmate. In addition, no one will guarantee that she will become a faithful wife after an extramarital affair in the past.
3. Forced conspiracy. At first, such a precaution will add spice to secret meetings. However, after a certain period of time, such spy games can get boring for both lovers.
4. . If an unfree lady came to your heart, then the thought that she belongs to another man can hurt. Representatives of the stronger sex in most cases are one hundred percent owners when it comes to serious feelings for a partner.
5. family drama. In addition to clarifying the relationship with a deceived husband, you can become the epicenter of all subsequent misfortunes in a woman. Public condemnation, ignorance or tantrums on the part of children can bring a lot of trouble to all participants in the resulting love trio.
6. The obsession of a partner. As already mentioned, in rare cases, a married lover begins to pursue her temporary chosen one. However, not a single womanizer is immune from the fact that his not free fairy of love will not turn into a fury who wants to leave her husband and legalize relations with a new lover.
7. sad happy ending. Some novels end with the woman deciding to leave the family for a new chosen one. However, over time, partners may become disappointed in each other. In the end, everyone will lose, because a married lady has all her bridges burned when it is impossible to continue relations with the culprit of the collapse of the family.

Note! Everyone has the right to decide his own destiny, but it is easy to see the problematic relationship "husband - wife - lover". You can’t joke about such things, because the future of the family is at stake, in which serious problems could temporarily arise.

How to end a relationship with a married woman

Not always intimate relationships with a woman in marriage deliver only positive emotions. In some situations, a man begins to think about the problem of how to end a relationship with a married mistress.

• . If it is necessary to end an intimate relationship, there is no need to postpone the conversation on such a difficult topic for an indefinite future. Many women subconsciously feel that the subject of their interest has cooled down to them. It is necessary in a very correct form to convey to the once attractive person that the feelings have passed and you need to leave. At the same time, it is worthwhile to turn into a skilled diplomat for a while so that the former passion does not feel used. If she suspects this, then a grandiose scandal simply cannot be avoided. Publicity in this matter is useless for both lovers, so you need to weigh every word in your farewell speech.
• Help from mutual friends. On rare occasions, two lovers are completely isolated from scrutiny by the public. Complete conspiracy in intimate matters from others is possible only in conditions of deep Cosmos. Therefore, anyway, someone is aware of the connection that has arisen on the side. If you are afraid of a difficult conversation, you can turn to a third party for help, but such an act will not look very presentable.
• Demonstration of a new object of passion. Some people will find this way of breaking up a relationship cruel, but then the mechanism of double standards will work. A deceived husband is a victim of a love triangle, so it is necessary to feel sorry for him first of all. If the unfaithful spouse realizes that her lover has a new muse, then she can return to the family with complete remorse for her deed.
• Ignoring a partner. Some men change their phone number and block their mistresses on social networks when they want to get rid of an annoying lady. Such actions are very effective, but they cannot be called decent behavior on the part of the stronger sex. You need to be able to answer for your actions, because human destiny is not a toy that can be broken and thrown away as unnecessary.
• Transition into relationships at the social level. With an adequate understanding of the impasse in the relationship, partners can try to translate their communication into exclusively business. This is especially true when it comes to office romance. Civilized contact with a former lover is real if the relationship has ceased to be of interest to one of the disappointed parties.

All these tips should be applied only taking into account the situation. If for some people they will become a happy salvation from a confusing situation, then for others they will turn into a complete collapse in their personal lives.

Watch a video about relationships with a married woman:

A love triangle is an opportunity to both acquire your happiness and destroy an already established life. Before starting an affair with a married lady, a man should put himself in the place of a deceived spouse. Everything in this world returns, so it is necessary to treat such things with maximum responsibility.

Mankind has long and unsuccessfully struggled with treason in relations between two people. It's all about the generally accepted morality of the society where we live. Society values ​​monogamy, and loyalty to one partner throughout life or long-term relationships between people is considered worthy of emulation. But for some reason, people now and then have novels on the side, and this happens not only when the young and inexperienced suddenly find themselves. A married man and a married woman can also be in a love relationship. In some cases, such relationships arise quite unexpectedly, while in others they fall like snow on their heads. And then a married man and a married woman, realizing that an affair has arisen between them, do not really understand what to do with all this.

In the layman's mind, most married men (especially if they are successful, don't need money, and still have very little to themselves) have, or at least should have, a mistress. The mistress should be young, free. For a man, this is such an expensive toy, like a luxury car. Only alive. Only for some reason no one seriously considers the option when a married man fell in love with a married woman.

A man makes gifts to his luxurious young mistress: he pays for housing or buys an apartment, a car, clothes, jewelry. The mistress in return gives him warmth and affection. He relaxes in her company, resting from his disgusted wife.

A similar image of the lover-lover relationship is replicated in tabloid literature and in the media. You will always see such a model of relationships in soap operas or trash serials about businessmen, policemen, women of difficult fate on our TV channels.

How the relationship between a married man and a married woman develops in life

But life is a more complex substance, and it is much richer in it. Including in relationships between lovers. Very often, a man does not need an expensive live toy at all. A man needs a woman next to whom you can really relax and unwind, get support from such a woman in those endeavors that the man’s family is skeptical about. In the end, a married man simply feels like a person, and not a breadwinner or the head of a social unit. At first, a friendship between a married man and a married woman may arise, and then these relationships will begin to develop incrementally.

In this case, the man will look not so much towards young girls, but towards almost the same age or women who already have some life experience. As a rule, most of these women are already married. And it is unlikely that such women are ready to divorce in order for a new man to enter their lives. There remains only an option that is officially condemned by our society, but in fact it occurs all the time: first sex, and then love between a married man and a married woman.

Why the relationship between a married woman and a married man can be comfortable

Why is a married man comfortable in a relationship with a married woman

Almost any woman who has agreed to the role of a mistress subconsciously tries on her current lover for the role of her future husband.

With a married woman, a married man is a little easier: she has such a desire too deeply disguised. Usually, from the outside, she has a completely ordinary life: a husband, children, work, friends and ... a lover. A married woman will think ten times before making any attempt to change one man for another.

A married woman will also think three times that her lover is also married, and therefore the changes will obviously affect the lives of more than two people who suddenly decided that they would now live together. That is why a married man is comfortable in a love relationship with a married woman.

First of all, from the point of view of security for one's own family, and because the current situation - a lover and a mistress, each of whom has their own families - can exist for a long time in time.

Additional outputs of the relationship of a married man with a married woman

For a married man in a relationship with a married woman, there are other positive aspects.

• sex life

The sympathy of a married man for a married woman arises from sexual interest. A married man and a married woman can have a new sexual experience in their relationship, unlike "family sex". At the same time, each of the lovers from the couple "married man and married woman" has a certain insurance in terms of getting STDs. No matter how hot the relationship between lovers is, each of them has a family behind their backs, and therefore venereal diseases are clearly not what they want to bring home.

The beauty of romance between a married man and a married woman

• Connection of a married woman with reality

A lover can give gifts to his mistress. But in the case of a married man and a married woman, such gifts will clearly not be cars, diamond necklaces or other expensive items. For a married woman, her lawful husband may well require an explanation if such gifts suddenly arise. And after such explanations, it’s not far to the revelations, and then - a divorce, courts, lawyers, alimony, and so on. It is unlikely that any of the lovers, burdened with families, wants such an ending for their relationship.

A married man can save a little on gifts for his married mistress.

• Confidentiality

As folk wisdom says, everything secret sooner or later becomes clear. With a young mistress, the secrets of a married man can cease to be secrets much earlier than with a married woman.

A married woman has no less reason than a married man to keep relations with him secret from her family and, above all, from her husband.

In this sense, a married man and a married woman play on the same team.

How can a married woman have a married lover

It is generally accepted that men are hunters and adventurers. In a world where adventure is a problem, and all hunting becomes a hunt for position and career, it is relationships with women that can give men a sense of their own importance.

How a married woman can have an affair with a married man

With women, things are much more complicated. Among them, of course, there are also adventurers and those who collect various men, but in most cases, for a married woman, an affair with a married man is a very bold step, which can be taken by really serious reasons.

One of these serious reasons is a strained relationship with her own husband. This may be due to the fact that people have been married for a long time, and the husband has lost interest in his own wife. Hence - rare (or none at all) signs of attention and the same rare sex. Sooner or later, such a woman is pushed to meet other men by sexual dissatisfaction and self-esteem falling below the plinth.

A woman’s relationship with her husband may also not work out because people who have married are at different levels of the social ladder or there has been a huge gap in their intellectual development.

This happens when a woman marries too early, having no life experience at all, but with his appearance, she begins to look at many things, including relationships with her own husband, with a great deal of objectivity.

In order for another man to appear in the life of a married woman who can be married, it is enough for such a reason as the betrayal of her own husband, which she found out about. In this case, at the initial stage of relations with a married man, a married woman can only be guided by revenge. Another thing is that a fleeting romance between a married woman and a married man can develop into a relationship in which love is born and which each of the couple begins to value no less than having their own family. Here, each of the couple - a married man and a married woman - can fall into a real psychological trap.

The risks of an affair between a married lover and a married mistress

There are perhaps two of the biggest risks in such a relationship. The first was mentioned a little higher: a married man and a married woman fall into a psychological trap from which there is practically no way out. A painful search begins for the answer to the question of what is more expensive: family, husband (wife), children, established ties and everything that is called “life” or relationships on the side.

It seems to a person that it is with this woman (man) that a completely different life is possible, which is written about in novels, trying to answer the question of what true love is. Sometimes this really happens, people give up what they have for the sake of new relationships in which they hope to find what they do not have. True, even according to statistics, the percentage of such new marriages, born from the relationship of a married woman and a married man, is negligible. But how do romances between unfree lovers end in most cases?

How do the novels of not free people end?

Prospects for romance between not free people

A romance between a married man and a married woman can last forever, but the statistics again show that this is not the case. On average, a relationship where the lover is married and the mistress is married lasts about three years. People can experience bouts of love and passion, and then cooling follows.

After about three years, in most cases, a married man and a married woman end their relationship. People understand that they value their own families more, they begin to think about relationships with their legitimate partners, they try to somehow improve them and take them to a new level. Very often, the experience gained in the novel on the side helps them in this, where each of the partners is also not free.

If you already have an affair with a married man, when you are married, try to enjoy such relationships while they bring joy, but never think that you can become the wife of this person, try not to try on this role for yourself, so that later you will not experience a feeling of bitter disappointment. If possible, try to avoid romance with married men (especially if you are married yourself), because there are no global prospects in such relationships. You can participate in such relationships exactly until the moment you feel love for this married man.

Hello! The essence of the problem is this, I fell in love with a girl, she has been married for more than 15 years. To be honest, when I met her, I immediately realized that I needed this girl and needed not for one night or two, I needed to wake up and fall asleep together (I did not hide this from her, about a month later she asked, I honestly confessed to her, of course there was no love then, strong sympathy). I was always against this kind of relationship, condemned them, directly categorically! Because I firmly believe that the family is the main thing, and even now I think so! The marriage is excellent, happy two wonderful daughters, they get along well with her husband, love him, there are of course rough edges, but no more than in any other family. So she loves me, she also loves me very much, takes care of me, worries constantly, we understand each other perfectly, we constantly communicate both at work and outside it, personally and by phone and other means of modern communication, she calls me at any more or less free time (I don’t bother her so as not to compromise, although it’s very difficult without her voice). What else to add? Oh yes, sexy, it was not like that, she asked at the last moment not to rush, but the time that we spent in the place it was flawlessly perfect! According to both sides. Naturally, she is not going to leave the family (although she said that she thought about it), in no case do I insist. We can’t part, although we probably don’t want to, we really don’t want to. The husband, in general, guesses, at least by the fact that she called him by my name more than once, and once she even told him that I was very dear to her. Help with advice, how to be, what to do? We've been dating for almost a year. I am a cancer, she is a scorpio. Thank you very much in advance for your understanding!

1 Feb 2016

Konstantin

Hello Konstantin!
I have read your message twice.
I did not find the subject of counseling.
I propose to find this item together, if it exists, or together to make sure that it does not exist.
You have a beautiful novel. And this is a great happiness.
It is impossible to choose or appoint partners in a novel, but it usually doesn’t work to “cancel” either.
About love, about a person who becomes expensive and attractive, dreams when he is not. But when he appears, very often everything goes not "along, but across." Well, you got such happiness, and you can rejoice in it, or you can make such a factory of problems out of it for yourself and for everyone who is somehow included in this story.
In other words - if it is impossible to have happiness as you want and as much as you want - is this a reason to turn this happiness inside out and turn it into a source of suffering!

2 Feb 2016

Vladimir good afternoon! Thank you so much for responding! Yes, you are right, the essence of bracelets is really not easy to find, in my appeal, and I indicated the topic incorrectly. The question, in general, is old and well known to everyone, what to do next? It is obvious that now we have reached such a point that it is no longer possible to physically manage without each other! But what to do with this is not entirely clear, or rather, it is not at all clear. Refusing arcs from a friend is not even in my thoughts! We seemed to be trying, but at each meeting, looking into the eyes, everything becomes clear to both. On the other hand, solving such a wonderful family is really bad.

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin

Hello Konstantin! As I understand it, you and your girlfriend work together and often contact each other outside of working hours? Tell me, please, age - yours and girls.
I see that you are experiencing dual feelings in this situation: on the one hand, there is an irresistible desire to be with her, on the other, there is no desire to destroy her family. In the first message, you wrote that the girl was not going to leave the family - did you discuss with her how in this case she imagines your relationship? And how do you imagine them?

2 Feb 2016

Maria, hello! Yes, you understood everything correctly, we work together and meet in our free time (unfortunately, there is very little of it). Yes, we discussed our relationship, the answer is always the same for both me and her, we don’t know how to present our relationship. We discussed what would happen if she decides to take this step, she is very worried and afraid that they will never forgive for the girls. And the husband will not forgive, but he is a good person. Although she is already beginning to quietly introduce me to the girls (with the youngest), without going into details, of course, either she will pick me up on her way to the kindergarten, or we will “accidentally” meet in that one. I am 34, she is 30. She lives with one person almost all her life consciously. That's the whole problem and lies in the fact that we DO NOT know how to proceed further and what to do with it

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin

先生道場

The essence of the problem is this, fell in love with a girl she has been married for over 15 years.

Click to reveal...

I'm 34 she is 30.

Click to reveal...

Or is your loved one really married at 15?

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin, sorry for the boringness, but somewhere you made a mistake, in my opinion:

Or is your loved one really married at 15?

Click to reveal...

Good afternoon No, I'm not wrong. To be quite precise, at 14, he himself is a little shocked that this happens, but nonetheless. I would not say that it was a marriage in his full understanding, but they lived together. Immediately anticipating your next question, they are both Russian Orthodox. Moreover, they are married.

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin

Konstantin, I understand your dilemma. You are at a loss and simply do not know whether something needs to be done, and if necessary, what exactly. Let's try to find the answer to this question together. Did I understand correctly - the girl indicated that she was not going to leave the family, but on the other hand, her behavior (calling for you on the way to kindergarten, telling her husband that you are dear to her, etc.) indicates such a possibility. As a result, you do not have complete confidence that she really thinks and what she wants - is that so?
And I hear that you do not have complete confidence that you will be happy with her if her family breaks up, because you are afraid of your own guilt (due to the destruction of an Orthodox marriage) and that the girl will later regret this fatal step. What other thoughts do you have about your fears in this situation?

2 Feb 2016

Yes, Olga, it is true that there is no complete certainty. At the expense of happiness, the question is not unambiguous. The fact that I will be happy with her, I have no doubt about it. In her, I see everything that has always attracted me in girls, starting from appearance, ending with personal and spiritual qualities, everything that I lack in myself is possible. But at the expense of guilt, here I’m afraid that you are right, not so much about Orthodox marriage (I’m a believer, but I think that if God had it, we would not have met) but about the destruction of someone else’s family with the established one, we withstood, with imposed life, with my own comfort, I’m very worried about girls. There are a lot of thoughts and a lot of fears, but you are right about the fact that the girl will be enchanted and about the fact that I will not be able to justify her hopes. Although she doesn’t require anything from me, on the contrary, she always says and does everything so that I feel good. She does not try to remake or change me (she just takes and changes something in me, for the better, and I will tell you this is not bad, it somehow happens gently, not noticeably). But the main thing is that I really can not understand what she really wants. These are my fears and worries.

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin

Konstantin, the situation is really complicated, and as you understand, there can be no single "recipe for happiness". Do you think that in a sincere conversation with a girl you will be able to understand what she really needs, what she really wants?
I would also like to clarify this point: you are changing for the better next to her, and this is important for you. Can you elaborate on this?

2 Feb 2016

Maria, the fact is that I am sure that she is always sincere with me. But unfortunately I can't fully understand it. Although our mutual understanding is sometimes so perfect that it feels like we have lived all our lives together in perfect harmony. As for the changes, I became less lazy, but mostly it's the little things, changes in clothes, in appearance, in communication. But I am sure that it can change a lot in my life. Yes, and I'm very sorry that in the previous post I called you Olga! I mixed something up) At the expense of happiness, I agree with you, of course there is no single recipe, but living according to patterns is not “tasty”.

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin

With a confusion of names - it's okay, don't worry, Konstantin.
You talk about a girl as a sorceress: "she is able to change a lot in my life" - but what exactly? Earlier you wrote that, perhaps, she has qualities that you lack - can you tell us more about this? It seems that you love the way you become next to her - is there such a thing?)
Konstantin, maybe you wrote - I didn’t see it - how long does your relationship last with a girl?

2 Feb 2016

Yes, Marina, I wrote literally in a couple of months it will be a year. I really, if you like, consider her a kind of sorceress. There are many traits in me that I would like to change, efficiency, laziness, not confidence in tomorrow. I have always been proud and never understood how you can "go under the heel" (maybe I got divorced for this, although there were many factors). But the fact is that I'm under her heel, ready. Because he is kind of soft, homely. And the fact that I love what I become next to her, no, I don’t agree, although this is also possible, but this is not the main thing. The main thing, apparently, is that I have not seen such warmth for a very long time, perhaps never, and this attitude towards my person, in general, is ordinary, oh, how captivating! On the other hand, I don’t do anything to somehow win her over, although I really want to give flowers, for no reason, etc. But I understand that in a team, and even more so at home, this can be interpreted quite ambiguously. All in all, it doesn't look good. The main thing that I understood in life, what vows do not give yourself, fate does as it pleases! How to escape from this captivity and is it worth it?

2 Feb 2016

Konstantin

Konstantin, I think you will agree that you yourself should give the answer to the last question, and only after a sincere discussion with the girl. According to you, she does not want to leave the family, which means that any of your actions towards the destruction of her marriage (without her consent) will in some way look like a betrayal.
It is interesting that you consider this situation as a prisoner: for whom - for you, for her or for both? Apparently, the girl is satisfied with the current state of affairs: on the one hand, she keeps her family (that is, the usual stability), on the other hand, she starts a new relationship with you that gives her what she lacks in marriage (perhaps this is novelty, understanding "at a glance", your strong feeling for her, which, due to the years she has lived, her husband no longer feels, the opportunity to realize his care for you). She has her own internal reasons for maintaining the current situation, and it is important to deal with them before taking concrete steps. Remember - she asked you not to rush - this applies not so much to sex as to the situation as a whole.
It seems that you feel trapped due to the ambiguity of the situation (you want to be together, but you don’t want to destroy your family) and with the words “fate will do as it pleases” you rely on the will of higher powers, because for you “nothing in life is accidental” - is that true? In such a complex issue, you really should not rush: you have already said and done everything so that the girl understands the seriousness of your intentions, and it seems to me that now you should give her time to calmly think it over and make an informed decision.

4 Feb 2016