Once upon a time you met him and you got hooked romantic relationship. You were in love and quite happy, but something went wrong. The relationship between a man and a woman is a kind of contract that is built on sexual, love, friendship, financial or psychological components. If any clause of the “contract” is not fulfilled, .

Breaking up can be quite painful. But sometimes it becomes even more painful if the ex begins to assert himself again. As a rule, this happens at the most unexpected this moment, when everything is already fine with you without him, and even more often when a husband and children appear.

There are many reasons why a former lover might write. It is necessary to pay attention not only to the fact that he suddenly, but also to the fact that he is the one for you.

If he mainly writes about how his business is going, most likely he just decided to show you that he is doing well without you. If he talks about his new woman, work, car, etc., means he wants you to regret breaking up with such a “great guy.” This reason your communication lies on the surface, but if you dig deeper, you can see his feelings that have not yet extinguished. Think logically, why would a person who is already happy tell you about this? Definitely, he still cares about you, even if he himself doesn’t understand it yet.

If your ex is more interested in your life, it means that he has not cooled off towards you. In this way, he shows signs of attention to you, because not every man knows how to listen to a woman.

If ex-love openly expresses his feelings to you, you must make an important decision for yourself.

Is it worth going back to your ex-boyfriend?

Immediately remember what caused your separation. It’s not for nothing that you had a relationship with him last time. Is it worth making the same mistake again?

Think about your real life. if you have reliable man and you are afraid of losing him, be careful when texting your ex. Do comparative characteristics your two lovers and compare the feelings you have for each of them.
Remember that there are guys who write ex-girlfriends just to unsettle them. Some of them want revenge for having once been abandoned.

In any case, it’s up to you to decide how to answer him and whether it’s worth answering at all. Listen to your heart and it will tell you why your ex-love is for you.

Tip 2: How to make a guy afraid of losing you

In our cruel world it is difficult to find truly loved one, especially girls. This is all because girls are obliged to lead a more moderate and quiet life, and they simply have nowhere to meet good people. young man.

Instructions

Many girls advise their friends to flirt with a friend of the guy they like. The method, of course, works, but only at the step where you just want to interest your beloved. And if you have been together for a long time, then periodic interested looks, which are aimed at best friend, can only ruin your relationship, and there is a possibility of losing your boyfriend. Not everyone will like your frivolity, especially in the presence of your significant other.

Good way To keep a man is to become the only and irreplaceable one for him. Always share his opinion and hobbies. Try to talk about topics that are interesting to both of you. Become not only a girlfriend for him, but also a friend. But it will be easier to make your boyfriend afraid of losing you when you periodically remind him that you are a girl and that you are a flirt by nature. You shouldn’t immediately agree to all his proposals; sometimes show your character. This method will not allow the guy to relax and think that you will not leave him anywhere.

Let the assumption of parting with such an interesting, beautiful and smart girl always in the air. Guys need to make things difficult when dealing with the female sex. It's boring with a simple girl, and you want to look for a new passion. That's why the best option in order to keep her boyfriend, will become for him interesting friend and a girl who constantly needs to be conquered.

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Sources:

• How to make a man leave you

People meet and separate, quarrel and make up. But it happens that relationships end in complete failure. A couple in love forgets about the wonderful moments they had and begins to hate each other with a passion. There can be many reasons for hatred, but often everything is destroyed by betrayal. So how can you take revenge on the offender for his actions? And most importantly – is it worth it?

Instructions

Even if the guy hurt you to the very heart, even if you are completely sure that he has no forgiveness, try to calm down first, and only then commit any serious actions. Women's revenge must be cold, cunning and subtle. Start acting when you put your thoughts in order.

Can you tell yours mutual friends that you left him because of his poor performance in bed. Say you couldn't stand this loser any longer. Be sure to ask them to keep it a secret so that your ex-lover doesn't know why the whole group is looking at him askance.

If the resentment still gnaws at you, you can go even further. Place an ad on a dating site on his behalf. For example: “I would like to meet an attractive young man for a serious relationship.” Don't forget to leave your mobile and work phone numbers. If your hatred is too strong, leave your address too. Believe me, after a few days, your offender will have a lot of “fans”. Let him then explain to each of them that he is not attracted to men.

If you want to take revenge beautifully, make him regret that you broke up. Start taking even more diligent care of your appearance. Update your wardrobe, make new hairstyle. Find yourself a worthy guy, let him understand what jealousy and regret are.

Great option– start dating his friend. Seduce his comrade, turn his head. Imagine how hard it will be for your ex to lose his best friend. He will never be able to forget such revenge.

If the ex-boyfriend found himself new girl, you have one more chance to get even on it. Ask one of the guys you know to help you out a little in this matter. Let your friend start writing her passionate messages on in social networks and on mobile phone. Messages should be of the following nature: “Thank you for the great time, you were great,” or “I miss you, looking forward to seeing you.” Once your ex sees these messages, he is unlikely to continue the relationship with his new passion, being confident that she is for him. Even if he believes in her innocence, there will be a scandal.

Take revenge ex-boyfriend It’s not at all difficult, but it doesn’t always make any sense. Better show him that he no longer exists for you. Be above him, do only the right thing. Forget about the existence of a person who is capable of hurting you so much, and you will definitely meet your true love!

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Communication on social networks - modern effective method meeting and communicating with the opposite sex. There is an opinion that commenting on posts on a young man’s page can quickly attract his attention and arouse sympathy for the girl.

Instructions

Think about where and what comments would be best to leave. It depends on how well you know him and how detailed his page is. If the guy is not yet on your friends list, but you want to attract his attention and arouse his interest in you, select those pages that are available for viewing and editing. This could be an avatar, some photo albums and a wall. Also, if you find publications from a guy in any community, you can take part in their discussion.

To attract a guy’s attention, it’s enough to write one or two words that will be compliments in his direction, for example, “handsome” or “avatar”. Be sure to add a smiling or laughing emoji at the end. You can even limit yourself to one smiling or winking emoticon as a comment. This will be enough for the guy to want to visit your page. You shouldn’t leave a lot of notes; it’s enough to comment on 1-2 photos so that you won’t be considered overly intrusive.

If you already know a guy and he is your friend, you can leave more comments and do it more often. Since all posts will be available to you, you can comment more often. Like photos, videos, and other posts and be more vocal. You can praise the guy for his creativity or appreciate his humor, etc.

Please pay Special attention to comment on posts on the guy’s wall (main page). You can express your point of view regarding this or that publication and its content - agree with the current quote, give an example from own life etc. In addition, to look more creative in the eyes of a guy, try commenting on his post by publishing a song below that has a suitable meaning or animated picture.

Don’t forget to put “likes” - “ ” marks, which are available on almost all social networks. It is not necessary to comment on every entry, but you can safely put marks, which sometimes will make a guy pay attention to you better than any words. And if he values ​​brevity and is easy-going by nature, you can leave funny emoticons under his posts.

Even more valuable than likes are reposts - sending other people's publications to your own page indicating the original source. Repost a few of the guy's posts that you think are most important. As a result, he will understand what you have with him common interests and outlook on life.

Tip 5: Why a guy doesn’t want to get married: main reasons

Some guys are in no hurry to go to the registry office, even if they are members long term relationship. Here it is, yours close girlfriend already three months after meeting her, she’s already trying on wedding dress, and you have been together for two years, and he constantly convinces you that the stamp in your passport will not change anything. In order not to rush to tie the knot, men have whole line reasons ranging from psychological problems and ending with completely earthly, mercantile considerations.

Previously, the average man could enjoy regular sex only after marriage, and this fact was a powerful incentive to force a man to get married. Nowadays, all couples have sex even without marriage, and a girl who maintains her virginity before marriage is a huge rarity. If all the joys of sex can be obtained without obligations, then why tie yourself to a family and limit freedom.

His mom doesn't like you

For some men, the opinion of his mother is very important, it just so happens and nothing can be done about it. Sometimes mother's love knows no limit. The mother thinks that her son is worthy best woman, and he listens to her opinion and is very afraid of hurting her, neglecting the opinion of the woman who once gave him life.

He doesn't want to share his property

You need to clearly understand for yourself what you are in relation to your chosen one. IN modern world There are fewer and fewer Cinderellas who found themselves a selfless prince, while having nothing in their souls. If a man has his own living space, Vacation home, an expensive car and a bank account, then he will be very careful about all contenders for his hand and heart. Of course, such a man is very popular among women, but sometimes it is very difficult to force him to marry.

He doesn't want to take responsibility

Even if at the moment you earn no less than him, you must understand that soon this situation will change dramatically, because with the birth of a child, a woman becomes completely dependent on her husband for several years. Some men sincerely do not want to enter into official marriage, because they are afraid that they will not be able to cope with the responsibility of the family.

He wants to create a strong foundation for marriage

If a man himself grew up in difficult conditions, for example, in a one-room apartment with his parents, grandmother and younger sister, then for your family life he definitely wants to create normal conditions. The idea was firmly entrenched in his head that in order to get married, he needed to achieve a lot in life: acquire normal housing, buy a car, achieve success in his career.

He wants variety

It is clear that there are monogamous men who, from the very early age tuned to serious relationship And strong family, but such guys, unfortunately, are very few. The majority of men are constantly striving for new sensations. Some men are simply in no hurry, because you can get married at forty or fifty years old. Women need to hurry things up, otherwise they may remain childless old maid, surrounded by cats and memories of bygone youth.

He doesn't love you

Men, no matter what, are looking for themselves the ideal woman worthy of love. If a guy doesn't propose to you, then maybe he just doesn't love you. Think about it, it often happens that they date one girl for years, and marry another just a month after they met. You can often hear similar words from men: “I just saw her and immediately understood that it was She.”

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They say that you cannot step into the same river twice, but some couples can renew their relationship again and again. Maybe the reason is the hasty decision to leave, which comes suddenly. Or the realization that better partner can not found. But whatever one may say, you can become happy in a relationship after the second and third attempts.

What to do if you feel that you want to renew your relationship with your ex and are already wondering what to write to your ex-boyfriend? Then decide to do it! But before that, think about how and when it’s best to do this. And is it worth writing to your ex at all?

If you are determined to do this, we will tell you what to write to your ex-boyfriend so that it really hooks him.

Young woman using smart phone on bridge.

WHAT TO WRITE TO YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND TO INTEREST HIM

If you met with your girlfriends and drank a couple of cocktails, don’t rush to grab the phone and dial your ex-girlfriend or think about what to write to your ex-boyfriend to hurt him. IN in this case he will not consider this gesture sincere and will think that it is not your feelings that are speaking, but those very drinks. If you want to renew your relationship with a man, it is better to do it consciously. Think about what to write to your ex-boyfriend and when is the best time to do it.

What is the purpose of your message

First, decide what the content of your letter should be. Perhaps you want to apologize for your behavior, or simply offer to meet. Or maybe you are thinking about what to write to your ex-boyfriend to get him back?

When you understand what goal you are pursuing, it will become clearer how to formulate your thought and what to write to your ex-boyfriend so that he will respond. Pick up Right words and start taking action.

Start the message by saying that you have accepted your separation. Write that you don’t hold a grudge against a man if you broke up due to his fault. If you yourself were the initiator of the breakup, then you can apologize for your behavior (suddenly you caused a loud scandal before leaving) and say that you regret what you did.

Or maybe he hurt you and you want to write something to him in revenge. What should an offended girl write to an ex-unloved guy so that it hurts him? For example, that you are much happier in your new relationship. That your current man is better than him in every way. And that the relationship with him was just a mistake.

What exactly do you want to say

If you are thinking about what to write to a guy after a breakup so that your message will hurt him, but... in a good way: that is, it did not leave him indifferent, then try starting with the following. Write how you live and tell him why you decided to contact the guy. If your letter begins with common phrase: “How are you?”, you risk not getting an answer. After all, the very fact that you are writing to your ex-man can stun him.

Think carefully about what to write to your ex-boyfriend, and how to do it so that he will respond. For example, tell us about how your life is going after the breakup, what has changed and write how you feel. And then ask him to talk about himself too.

WHAT TO WRITE TO YOUR EX AND HOW TO DO IT RIGHT

Form is as important as content

Still wondering what to write to your ex, but still... desired guy, with the sole intention of getting him interested? Then consider not only the meaning, but also the form of presentation. You probably know that sometimes it is not what we say that is more important, but how we convey our thoughts. For example, about the fact that you constantly think about your ex-man can be said in different ways:

• I know that my letter will surprise you, but if it is convenient for you, I would like to talk to you.
• I miss you and I can’t even imagine what I will do if you don’t answer me.

If in the first case you will look confident, then in the second you will look more desperate. Therefore, form your thoughts correctly and choose the most suitable words for them.

Sincerity comes first

If you're thinking about what to write to your ex, but nothing comes to mind, just write about how you feel. If your breakup was your fault, then it's never too late to apologize to your ex-boyfriend. Especially if your breakup was accompanied by quarrels and hysterics.

When you write sincerely, the letter conveys regret for what you have done. Tell us about your intentions to rebuild the relationship, taking into account previous mistakes. This is enough and you won’t need to figure out what to write to your ex-boyfriend to interest him.

Correct format

When you have already decided what to write to your ex-boyfriend, choose the right format. If you want to interest him first, write short SMS, in which you can indicate that you need to talk. Well, if you want to tell about everything at once and you can’t choose what to write to your ex, then you can prepare long letter, which will express your feelings, experiences and intentions.

In any case, having decided what to write to a guy to hurt him, think about whether it’s worth writing at all. After all, if your contradictions, internal or external, remain unresolved, then it is unlikely that you should enter into the same relationship again. Perhaps this is just not your person?

If you are 100% sure that you want to tie your fate with your ex-boyfriend again, then cast aside all doubts and write what your heart tells you.

In the age of information technology, communication has acquired an element of play. When you sit alone with a computer, different thoughts often come into your head, and we begin to think: maybe we should write to the person with whom so much is connected pleasant memories?

So why is it sometimes better not to return to the past?

1. Contain surging emotions

Perhaps you miss not the person, but the emotions that you experienced when communicating with him and the state of falling in love. In this case, most likely, you will want to feel happy again for a couple of minutes. If you write a message and don't experience old feelings, then you will be disappointed. So think carefully about whether you need this before coming up with a reason to communicate.

2. Don’t give your ex an extra reason to be happy.

Imagine that you sent a fiery speech declaring your love and apologizing for all your actions. If you don't get an answer, your self-esteem may suffer, and then you risk falling into depression. But your ex-boyfriend’s self-esteem will definitely increase, because since you write to him, and not he to you, it means there is no doubt - he is perfection, and you still dream of being next to him.

3. Make it a rule: you need to say all the most important things in person.

If you think that the relationship can be restored, then a soulless text message is unlikely to help you. It's better to talk to your ex-lover one-on-one. Still, it is unlikely that you will be able to convey your loving gaze even with the help of emoticons. The chance that he will be interested in the words you wrote in a fit of emotion is very small. But there are guarantees that he will be able to resist your feminine charm, far less.

4. Remember: the man must make the first step

Even if you are very proactive and your favorite heroine is Tatyana Larina, you should not write to your lover first. Better wait some time. Maybe he himself cannot stand being separated from you and will call. It’s another matter if you were the culprit of the disagreement, but, however, even in this case it is better not to rush into apologies, but to calmly assess the situation. Maybe it’s for the best that everything turned out this way?

5. Remember why you broke up

If you ended the relationship, then something definitely went wrong. Were you offended or betrayed, or were you rarely given gifts or compliments? Or maybe he's just lazy or a miser?

Even if you were not the initiator of the breakup, think carefully, maybe you had a reason to end this relationship. Try to remember your shortcomings more often former half. This is a great motivation not to write or call him.

6. Analyze your main motive

Why are you so drawn to write to your ex? Maybe you're just bored? Keep yourself busy. For example, sign up for a swimming pool or fitness class. Plan your day so that there is simply no time left for regrets about the breakup.

7. Avoid peer pressure

“All the girlfriends are with guys, and I’m alone,” you think to yourself. Moreover, friends add fuel to the fire: “Well, how is Fedya? Haven't made up? you were like that beautiful couple" Of course, in this case you begin to feel lonely. Try to look at the situation from the other side: you are not abandoned, but free and are considering worthy candidates to win your hand and heart.

8. Check the information

If you have heard rumors that your ex-lover is still single, then do not rush to believe them, but rather check this information carefully. Otherwise, you may find yourself in an awkward situation. For example, one of my friends, having learned that her ex-boyfriend was having a hard time going through a divorce from his new chosen one, wrote to him. And the next day I received a call from legal wife young man. It turned out that the guy was not even thinking about getting a divorce and was quite happy in his marriage. I think it’s not worth retelling the meaningful and not very pleasant conversation between the two ladies.

« Why sky blue color?”, “Is there a God in the world?”, “Is it normal to correspond with an ex?” - these are the most difficult questions questions that we ask ourselves when we are alone.

Imagine this: you have just watched your favorite TV series for the 12th time. It's so quiet in your apartment that you can hear the upstairs neighbors quarreling over the uncleaned cat litter box. You are definitely bored and lonely.

And at some point you realize that you don’t see anything wrong with writing “Hello!” to my ex-boyfriend.

I know this condition because I went through it myself. Yes, of course, I also attracted the attention I needed and entertained myself with simple communication with my “ex”.

But I have also been on the other side of these barricades. And here's what I will say: receiving messages from exes is not always pleasant. Especially if you're quite happy with someone else and are moving on.

That being said, are there times when it is appropriate to text your ex? Yes, sure. If you really broke up friendly relations and there are no longer the same emotions between you as before, then everything is fine.

Source: bt.no

But this is not the only rule that works. I had a conversation with relationship coach Chris Armstrong about this topic, and this is what he told me.

Can you text him right after the breakup?

According to Armstrong, you don't have to wait too long to be able to message him. This is, of course, if you managed to avoid a dramatic breakup. Waiting creates awkwardness.

Try to build a strong bridge between the relationship and friendship. Of course, this does not mean that you should write to him immediately after the door has closed behind him.

I had a similar story. Our breakup happened at the store, and I received three messages before I even got to my car. I swear it's true! The car was parked 20 feet from the entrance.

Wait at least a few days so that each of you has time to get used to the new status of your relationship. This will be much more effective than doing it on the night of separation.

Can you congratulate him on the holidays?

You wish your friends a happy birthday, so why can’t you send an SMS to your ex? In any case, this is Armstrong's position.

This would be a bad idea if one of you wants to be friends and the other is emotionally stuck in your relationship and is still suffering.

By wishing them a Happy New Year, you may be giving them false hope for a future together.

Can you text your ex if one of you is in a relationship?

Correspondence with your ex in this case is risky, but not impossible. But please consider the feelings of everyone who is now associated with you.

Armstrong says that you should avoid all contact with your ex only in 2 cases: when he is just starting a new relationship and when you are in it. It's hard to build trust with someone new if you're still in constant contact with your ex.

A few days ago, by coincidence, I suddenly found myself driving a car along an empty highway and listening to new song Adele "Hello" Everything boded well for a good day. The sun was shining brightly - and this was at the end of November, the air far from the city was fresh and pleasant. I stopped thinking about problems, and my loneliness became as comfortable and carefree as possible - just like I try to make it look on Instagram. There were no signs of trouble. But what I didn’t predict was that a few minutes later I would think: “Maybe I should text my ex?”

It's all Adele's fault. Well, you know that the song “Hello” is about exes. And how many people, after listening to her, decided to do this crazy act! Write to your ex. Or an ex. And I wrote. And we agreed to have coffee. But then I came to my senses and canceled the meeting. Like Adele, I'd like to say "Hi" to him, but unlike her, I don't want to say "Sorry" for what I did. I didn't do anything (except decide to live without him). If I really felt guilty, I would call him or write to Facebook. But after some thought and discussion with friends, I realized harsh reality: No the right reason write to your ex.

Well, let's think about some facts.

SMS is a very short and simple message. It's something you can write on the go, from anywhere, without much thought.

Now let’s compare SMS with a breakup. Breaking up is a very long and complex message, one that needs to be thought about seriously and for a long time. This could be very painful, or it could just be a wise, balanced decision for both of them. These two concepts are at opposite ends of each other.

The desire to write to your ex appears various reasons: from boredom, loneliness, lust, thirst for attention, or simply from an inexplicable desire to complicate your life. But why give yours ex opportunity to be glad that you haven’t forgotten him yet and want to see him? If you're bored, call your friend former classmate, or go shopping. If you want sex, well, I don’t know, watch something like that and satisfy yourself. If you decide to write to your ex, then remember that it will not be as romantic as in the song or in the movie.

Of course, not all exes are terrible. But if you have a respectful reason to reunite with him, would you do it impulsively via text? Probably not. All the most important things are not said via SMS. And if you have something to write to him in a message, then it’s not worth telling him, despite your great desire.