Friends are the most important part of our life. Friends support us in difficult moments and rejoice with us in happiness and joy. Nevertheless, friendship can bring not only positive, but also negative emotions. Your friends can betray you. And the probability of this increases significantly if you do not distinguish friends from enemies in time.

What is a friend?

A friend is a person who can give self-interest if it benefits you. In this regard, it is worth deciding right away:

1. Who do you think is capable of sacrificing their interests for yours?

2. For whom are you able to sacrifice your own interests?

By answering these two questions, you can roughly calculate the approximate number of your friends. Moreover, you can immediately weed out those comrades for whom you are not ready to make sacrifices. These are acquaintances, comrades, lovers or mistresses, but definitely not friends. The first point is more difficult to determine. We can expect altruism towards ourselves from one person, but this “friendship” will let us down, despite loud statements from his side. At the same time, another person, whom you doubted, can help, and do it absolutely free of charge, as a friend should. From the above, we draw two conclusions:

1. A friend is a person capable of altruism towards us . At the same time, we ourselves are capable of altruistic actions in relation to this person.

2. A friend is someone who does, not just talks.

Of course, “doing” can also be in talking (for example, words of support that you need), but trusting words about your “ great friendship' is not worth it.

How to check a friend?

“Friends and loved ones are not checked” - a familiar phrase? Go far away from the one who told you this. If you don’t check your friends in time and unreasonably trust them, you can coolly “hit” - they will set you up, or simply leave you in trouble at the most inopportune moment. And from your relationship to this person it doesn't depend. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about. So, to check a friend we need:

1. A situation in which you need help.

2. Phone.

Let's say your car stalled in the middle of the highway hundreds of kilometers from home. Let's say it happened at 23:00-00:00 in a non-busy area. You call a friend and ask for help. Now remember one thing: no matter what this person is doing now, he will drop everything and go to rescue you if he really considers you his friend. Of course, there are exceptions. For example, your friend is now on a plane or even in another country. In this case, he really can not help you. But if he has even the slightest opportunity to do this, if he considers you a friend, this person will not let you down. If the one you asked for help, under all sorts of pretexts, shirks from helping you, he is definitely not your friend. Purely theoretically, you can even be sent to all four sides for such a late call. Cut these people out of your life immediately. Those who did not agree to help can not be crossed out, but they cannot be considered friends either.

How to understand that this is a friend?

A friend is a person who:

1. You can tell everything without fear of seeming weak.

2. You can talk not only about your successes, but also about problems. A friend will listen and support.

3. Nothing to share with you. A friend is able to make concessions, caring not only about his own, but also about your well-being. A friend can help.

4. You trust.

Who is a comrade?

Unfortunately, most of those whom we call friends are really just our comrades! A friend is characterized by:

1. The desire to hear only positive things from you. As soon as something negative happens in your life, the friend’s interest in you, if not completely disappears, then significantly weakens.

2. Unwillingness to commit altruistic acts towards you.

3. Mimicry for friendship. You can have fun with a friend, but don't count on the fact that this person will do something for you.

I must say right away that comrades are not bad. But there is one danger here, which is your high expectations. If you consider a comrade a friend, but in reality he considers you only a comrade, one not very fine day you can break off big. Therefore, do not expect much from comrades. At the same time, do not let your comrades get too close to you. There is no need to take them for friends and sacrifice your own interests for the sake of such camaraderie.

Who is this enemy?

In our case, an enemy is a person who disguises himself as a friend, pursuing his own goals that are contrary to your interests. Relatively speaking, if a friend spends time with you, helps you, sacrifices his interests and listens to you, and a friend just spends time with you (walking, having fun, but not helping when you need it), then the enemy will behave as a comrade, but one day, not very fine, he will set you up, trampling your interests for the sake of his own. If a friend can put your interests above their own, a friend simply will not overstep your interests, then the enemy will spit on you for the benefit of their interests and goals.

How to behave?

I propose to take a closer look at the people whom you consider your friends, and begin to behave with them the way they behave with you. Put your friend's interests ahead of your own. Have fun and have fun with a friend, not counting on the fact that he will be with you in Hard time. Do not waste your strength on him, in unilaterally putting his interests ahead of his own. Get rid of enemies by breaking ties with them.

Only in this way can you:

1. Protect yourself as much as possible from disappointments in friendship.

2. Make yourself stronger.

3. Make your real friends stronger.

4. Do not spray your strength on people who do not reciprocate your feelings.

The day will come when you will notice that your friend cannot look you in the eye. If this happens, it means that your friendship is starting to develop into something else. Difficulties arise when friendships develop into love, but if the relationship succeeds, it is worth the trouble. Who better to give your love than your best friend.

What to do if your friend is indifferent to you?

Imitation is one of the strongest indicators of attractiveness. This has been demonstrated in a number of scientific research related to psychology and mechanisms of attraction. So, if you notice that your friend is suddenly mirroring your body language or other behavior, if that could be a sign that you are attracted to you.

They love to keep you guessing

If your friend suddenly starts to overwhelm you - with gifts, food, or something else - it can be a strong signal that they are attracted. Frequency is important here because, by nature, some people are just extremely generous. But, intuition and common sense will stimulate the notion that they are acting oddly.

Steps

1. 1 Watch for signs that your friend has a crush on you. Your best friend knows you so well that his feelings begin to develop into love. Here are a few things to keep an eye on in the beginning:
   • Your friend is very quiet in your presence. This means he doesn't want to say something "stupid" that might change your opinion of him.
   • Your friend can't look you in the eyes for more than a couple of seconds. This is a sign that he does not want you to understand his feelings for you.
   • Your friend is looking at you all the time. This is a sign that he can no longer hide his love.

2 Spend time with him/her. If you share his feelings, try to spend as much time together as possible. In this way, you will spend as much time as you wish in his environment, as well as your friend. Interesting things happen when two lovers spend their time together. Who knows? Maybe he/she can confess his feelings.

3 Look for signs of flirting. Flirting doesn't lie at least, those who know how to notice it. If you don't know how to spot them, don't worry. Here short list things you should watch out for:

• He or she is looking for an excuse to touch your shoulder, arm or palm, hug you or take your hand. It goes without saying that kissing also falls into this category.
• He or she asks you for a favor. He/she asks to hold a bag, help with homework, or just do some kind of favor. These are innocent signs, but along with others, you can be sure that your friend is flirting with you.
• He or she constantly compliments you. Here are some examples that can mean hidden feelings:
  • “Wow, you are so good at using an axe. I never thought that someone could be so… courageous!”
  • “You are always so the most beautiful among your friends. Even when you wear uggs with a turtleneck, you look better than your friends in makeup and heels.

2. 4 Ask leading questions. Take your friend to a quiet place where you can be alone and ask him innocent questions like "If we were at a ball, who would you choose to dance with?" or "Who do you think is your best friend", if you're lucky, the answer will be "You". At this point, you can tell him something like "I feel the same way too!" and hug him. Here are other questions you can ask him:

   • “Who do you trust the most? For example, if the world were to end, who would you save?”
   • “I was thinking, if my boyfriend decided to leave me before the party, would you replace his place? Just out of curiosity."

3. 5 Keep track of the behavior that your friend exhibited when he liked someone. You have been there to observe his behavior before.

   • For example, if your friend blushed when he was around a girl he liked and suddenly blushed when he was around you, that's a sign that he likes you.
   • Another example. If your friend wrote notes to his ex-girlfriend, and now he started writing notes to you, then most likely he likes you.

4. 6 Watch his behavior in a group of people. When you're in a group of friends, keep track of how much attention your friend gives you. This is a good way to understand if he loves you or not. But, be careful. Your friend may be ignoring you because he is shy and uncomfortable. Therefore, he keeps his distance so as not to feel constrained. Don't pay too much attention to it.

5. 7 Ask him (optional). If you're still not sure, just ask him. There is only one exact way find out if someone likes you, but you have to take a chance! Someone may not want to risk their friendship for the sake of their feelings. On the other hand, he may think that you love him, and this is just a way to get him to ask you out on a date.

   • Before asking, make sure you want the relationship to become romantic. If you don't want to, it's best to avoid the interrogations and let the feeling cool down. If your best friend decides to confess his feelings, you can discuss everything with him.
   • If you want to ask, you can say something like "I don't want to scare you, but I've noticed a change on your part, and I think it's because our relationship has changed a bit." It will be great chance for your friend to confess his feelings. If your friend doesn't confess and says "Don't be stupid. We're just friends," you can answer him, "Yes, of course, I just asked out of interest, everything is fine." If your friend is afraid to admit his feelings or is trying to overcome them, it may take him a little time to confess to you. Be patient and don't pressure him.

6. 8 Hint him. If you are experiencing feelings other than friendship, you will have to take the first step. It's not easy to do, but it's worth it if you know what you want.

   • Don't pay too much attention to this, just ask him something like "Have you ever thought of asking a non-date, let's say... me?" and smile. He can drive you away today and come back to you tomorrow.
   • Don't act desperate, this can show your friend that you only like him because you want a relationship and he is an easy solution to your desire.

• When you talk to him, watch how much he laughs at your jokes and your actions. If he laughs more than usual, he probably likes you.
• Be yourself, even if you like him. If your friend likes you, then he likes you the way you are.
• Try to communicate with friends not only through Vkontakte or messages.
• Don't make a move when your friend is with other friends. Both of you will be embarrassed.
• Make sure you have enough personal space. Better to stay away from other people.
• Be relaxed no matter what happens. Whether you have feelings for your friend or not, it's important to know how your friend sees you. If you notice strange behavior your friend to you, give him the freedom to express his feelings. This will make it easier for him and you will be able to keep your friendship.
• Whatever happens, you can always choose friendship over romantic adventure. Friendship will remain forever.
• It is better to communicate face to face so that the answer is sincere.
• Don't directly ask your friend if he loves you. You will put him in an awkward position.
• Do not ask him if he loves you through the Vkontakte website.
• If you like her or him, tell him/her that.
• It's easy to understand if a friend likes you. But if your friend likes you, and he knows how to hide his feelings, then the situation changes.
• Don't be shy if you have feelings for your friend.
• Think carefully about your decision, as in the event of a breakup, it can change your relationship forever.

Warnings

• If you have feelings for your best friend, but they are one-sided, you should step back for a while to come to terms with the fact that he will always be just a friend. If you have a friend who has feelings for you that you do not share, he will need time to separate the feeling of friendship from love. But don't say goodbye. Let this be a temporary separation. Tell your friend that you need some time to get used to the idea of ​​simple friendship. If your friend is a true friend, he or she will understand and give you the time you need.
• Do not talk about it in places where others can hear you. What you say to each other and feel for each other is your own business. It doesn't matter if you want to stay just friends or try to build a love relationship, this should not worry anyone but yourself.

You have known him for many years, maybe even sat at the same desk at school, walked together after school, took exams at the institute together, or you just have been friends with the same company for a long time. You dedicated your best friend to your secrets, in difficult times you supported each other. It's hard to imagine a better friend than him. But time goes by, and you realize that you have fallen in love with your best friend. How to be?

They become available when you are around.

They suddenly get shy around you

It's all different, but sudden shyness can be a sign of attraction. Either way, this could be a good indicator. They always laugh at your jokes. Except, of course, for your potentially infatuated friend? It could be a good sign what they think of you more intimately. As with many things on this list, frequency and suddenness are good barometers.

They touch you every chance they get

If your friend is either touching you more than usual or making an effort to close the distance between you, this could be a good sign that they are crushing. D.; or he may show up more subtly, such as "accidentally," bumping into you, or constantly cleaning you in a crowded place. As we started to get closer, I had obvious relationship questions.

What to do if you fall in love with your best friend

To begin with, you should think carefully about what to do next: hide your feelings and try to drown them out or go towards love. Assess the degree of your love. Perhaps it's just jealousy for some girl from your own company. Have yourself an evening psychological analysis, think about all the pros and cons, paint a picture of your future, and if you can’t imagine your happiness without it, then ...

I had a feeling of attraction, but we were just friends. The average guy has friends who are attracted to him and wonder if he can take the relationship from friendship to romance. But since he doesn't want to embarrass himself or ruin a friendship, he usually waits, the other one guesses for himself and holds back. Wouldn't it be great if there were clear signs that she loves you more than a friend?

The good news is there are signs! They are not crystal clear in the sense that you get a "red" or "green" light telling you the ultimate yes or no. However, these signs can at least give you an idea if your feeling of attraction is for your friend. This will allow you to make an educated guess as to whether she really likes you more than friends, or if you're going to remain buddies.

If you have come to the conclusion that you really fell in love with your best friend, then it's time to act! You know him better than anyone else. You know all the movies he likes, the music he listens to, you know his habits and interests. There is already the first step in your relationship - trust. And if all your knowledge about it is skillfully put into practice, then everything will work out for you!

Now is the time to take our entertaining and completely and completely unscientific quiz! As you try to read her signs, keep in mind that this rather art than science. For example, if she has multiple signs, chances are better she is attracted to you than if she has only one. Look at the bigger picture based on the tips below instead of taking one point and judging.

In dating, women play a more passive role. Although they are more independent these days, for the most part the guy is stalking and the girl is being stalked. Thus, most women are not going to tell you that they want to meet you directly. But they will drop the hints and let you know how they treat you subtly. They can talk a lot about sex around you, mention about physical contact how to enjoy a kiss or sympathy to hold hands. They might even say things like "I'll let you do it" to something physical or romantic.

It will be better if you create a closer and more romantic atmosphere between you. Invite him to ride bicycles to a quiet beautiful lake, go to a romantic exhibition together, watch a movie about love. If you do everything easily and unobtrusively, then you will not frighten him away with a stream of surging feelings.

Show him that you are a beautiful girl, and not just "your own on the board." Surprise him. Dress to feel irresistible, desirable and feminine. Be confident. Take care of yourself, love yourself. He will definitely pay attention to your changes in himself, and think about who they are dedicated to, and perhaps he himself will guess that you have fallen in love with your best friend. If to another, perhaps jealousy will surge in him, and now he himself will try to keep you close to him. If he guesses that you are doing everything for him, he will appreciate it!

These hints are signs that you like her. This could mean that she wants you to take the lead in asking her out and taking the relationship to the next level. You can tell if she loves you with her tongue. The best thing about this is that you can watch what she's doing, which makes the discussion about how she feels so much easier.

Remember also that body language is not done in the mind. While it may be fake, she probably isn't trying to control it. Thus, observing her body language is a good indicator of her true feelings. Here are some body language signs that she loves you more than a friend.

Touch him more often. As if by chance, with a lacquer movement, touch your shoulders, take his hand. Give him compliments. Notice how well he drives a car, that it is easy, calm and comfortable with him, and that he is an ideal man. For you.

What if you fell in love with your best friend? Be yourself, stay the same kind, affectionate, sympathetic, laughing. He will appreciate the fact that next to him dear, a tender girl. And, perhaps, you will be the first to hear the long-awaited recognition from him.

When you speak, does she lean in? Does she have a head when you look at her? Is she heard when you are together, or is she hunched over? In general, more open language bodies is the sign you like and closure is the sign she has closed for you.

While openness may mean that you like her in general, even as a friend, she tells you that at least she is comfortable for you. This is the first step towards meeting her. The old saying goes: "The eyes are the window of the soul." In this case, the eyes are the window to her romantic and sexual desires, if you pay attention.

What to do if you fall in love with your best friend

Today, friendship between a man and a woman is very common. You have a best friend and this person is a man. He always supported in difficult times, always helped if something was needed, said parting words, helped restore confidence and much, much more.

If you catch her looking at you, whether from a distance or in uniform through eye contact, she probably finds you attractive. People tend to look at what they like and they don't know they are doing it. Second, look at your students when you're with her. If they are expanded in normal light, then this is a sign that you like her. If they are more narrowed, then it is less attractive.

Pupil dilation is a sign of attraction that she can't control, so it's a good indicator. Be aware, however, that pupils are dilated in low light and constricted in bright light, so it is important to observe this when normal conditions lighting.

In general, this person is one of the dearest and closest people in your life. But suddenly, after a long search and after unsuccessful romances, you realize that this particular best friend is the ideal man for you and you fell in love with your best friend.

Of course, you can immediately confess your feelings to him. But sometimes and even often it scares guys. You can be made to look at you not as a good friend, but also as a girl. If you are close friend for him, then you certainly know what exactly attracts your dredge in girls.

Most people won't touch anyone they don't find attractive. Touch is a sign of attraction. If she touches you a lot, even in a non-sexual way, she probably finds you attractive, or at least not repulsive.

Obviously, if she touches you romantically, like hugging, kissing, etc. She thinks of you as someone else. One of the best signs she likes romantically is if she flirts with you. This usually means laughing at your jokes, being playful, joking, smiling and having fun. Some guys are bad at flirting, so they miss the signs.

Maybe then he will understand that the dream girl is so close and so close. But still, what if you fell in love with your best friend?

Change your image dramatically - that's what will help girls who do not know what to do if they fell in love with their best friend. Together with your friend, you have experienced a lot: unforgettable trips as a savage to the south, sports competitions and so on.

However, keep in mind that some women are just flirtatious while others are not. So, if she has a bubbling personality and flirts with all the guys, you are not special. Likewise, if she isn't flirting with anyone, then her lack of flirting might mean nothing. But for average woman flirting with you is a positive sign.

Finally, David and I have a saying: "People pay attention to what they like." In other words, a big sign that she loves you is like more than a friend, this is how she spends her time. If it's with you, then there is good chance that she wants more.

Then it's time to show your feminine side. Flawless makeup, shoes on high heels, chic dresses- this will definitely help open the eyes of your best friend.

important and most the main task- show your perfect guy that you have exquisite taste. Make an appointment with him in some intriguing place. For example, in a bar where jazz is played. It all depends on your imagination and on yourself.

Does she always want to go out when you ask? Does she respond quickly when you text and hire? Does she transform others to spend time with you, even dates? If you receive best time and attention, this is a great indicator that you like it!

So these signs should help you identify her. true feelings. If you have a lot of these signs, then you are good to go! How do you know if your best friend loves you? There may come a day when you notice that your best friend can't look you in the eye. Assuming this is true, the problem may be that the friendship has blossomed into a bit of a rout. There are a lot of relationship issues with your best friend, but in case the relationship works, then it's generally worth it. Who else would your best friend want to give their love to?

Invite your best friend to go somewhere on vacation together. It can be a place where there is sea, sun and beach. There you can hint to him that you fell in love with your best friend, as well as demonstrate your body and beauty. Also don't forget what guys love practical girls. Therefore, do not miss the opportunity to show your skills and strengths.

Steps to tell if you like your best friend

Look for signs that your friend is breaking you. Your best friend was able to get to know you, obviously, and your friendship may have turned into a romantic attraction on their part. Below are some signs of being on the lookout in the first place. Your friend is always very peaceful around you. This is a sign that they would rather not say something "inept" that will allow you to improve your psyche.

Your friend will never have the opportunity to look you in the eye for more than a couple of seconds. This is a sign that they would rather not telegraph their love yet. Your friend is looking at each of you. A sign they can't resist the opportunity to telegraph their love. Who said figuring out if you liked your best friend was easy?!

Rivals can also help show your best friend that you are the girl of your dreams. Invite him to some social event. Do not forget, there you should look stunning and dazzling. The crowd of fans that will definitely surround you this evening will help you consider your attitude towards your best friend. For most men, it is important that her girlfriend evokes universal admiration, and for owners, this is help that will hurry to take the first step.

Spend time with him or her to find out if your best friend loves you. In case you happen to feel the same way, try and hang out more often so you communicate your desire to be in his or her organization as much as they want to be in yours. Smart things happen when people who love each other hang out. Your friend may even level up by admitting that you like them if they are sure you will.

Look for signs of flirting to see if your best friend loves you. An aged flirt does not lie, in any case to those who can read the signs. In case you don't know how to read the signs, don't stress! Here is some intensive training on what you should be looking for.

What to do if you love a friend

In life, there are all sorts of things. And it happens that we ourselves do not even notice how this something is happening to us. Happens in life and truly a difficult situation like love for a friend. Surely your friend will be shocked if he finds out about this. Maybe you yourself, having understood this once, were very shocked.

He or she discovers reasons for touching you. On the arm, on the shoulder, on your arm; contrasting arms hugging you and holding hands. Evidently, embracing and kissing additionally belong to this classification. He asks you to give charity. Hold their bag, do work for them, help them out with homework. Some of them may be impeccably innocent, however, in case you notice various signs of flirting around them, they are not cynical.

Once again it's hard to say, but they could be something like. It's amazing, you're great with an axe. You are always the best dressed among your friends. Then you must make the following requests. Who is the person you trust the most? Like if the world was complete and you had to name one person to save money, who would it be?

But what to do in a situation if you fell in love with your best friend? To begin with, it is important to understand that the former friendship between you is no longer possible. You can, of course, calmly pretend that nothing happened, but you must understand that this is just self-deception.

You also need to decide whether you really love a friend or not. Maybe you woke up female jealousy Or just a sense of ownership? You need to think carefully about this: what do you want - for your friend to become your soulmate, or for him to no longer look at other girls?

In the event that you were around to watch your best friend, you may have thought about how they act when they are around someone they love. For example, if they blush a lot around a girl who likes them and all of a sudden they blush around you, that's a big clue. It's almost like saying "I like you" with a flaming titan badge.

Alternatively, maybe your best friend has always passed on his previous notes and he suddenly passes notes on to you. This may be a random event, however, apparently, this is not the case. Turn on the bits of knowledge, Sherlock! Observe their friend behavior to see if your best friend loves you. This good marker that your best friend loves you. A few friends overlook you because they are shy or preoccupied. This makes them try to stay away from you so they don't put themselves down, or refrain from feeling awkward, so take that with a grain of salt.

If in practice it turns out that this is banal female jealousy and possessiveness, then the issue is resolved. But if it turned out that you are truly in love with your friend, then it's about something else.

What to do if you fall in love with a friend

If it turned out that you really fell in love with your best friend, then you should not immediately become discouraged and put an end to your relationship. It may very well be that he has the same feelings for you, but he cannot admit it to you, or even to himself.

That's what you should find out in the first place - how nice you are to him. Even if you know that your friend once loved you, this does not mean at all that his feelings have not lost their relevance to this day.

Take a closer look at how he communicates with you, how he talks to other girls. If he behaves with you in an emphatically friendly way, this is one thing, but maybe he is nice to you, caring and worried about you.

You can flirt with him a little and see how he reacts. You can even hint that you like him, but, of course, do not declare that you fell in love with your best friend. This must be done with the help of gestures, looks, but not with words and not directly, otherwise it can scare even the person who likes you. If he himself is in love with you, then such tactics should give positive result.

You can, of course, directly decide on straight Talk with a friend, but then you must understand that in case of a negative answer from his side, your friendly relations will be over. But it is important to do this if your secret feelings gnaw at you from the inside, interfering with your personal life and new acquaintances.

We deal with friendship throughout our lives. Since childhood, we spend time with those whom we consider friends. Are they really friends? In childhood, we consider everyone with whom we communicate as comrades, but as we grow older, they become less and less. Why is this happening? Friends - what kind of people are they? Why are they playing like this? important role in our life?

What are friends?

Unfortunately, the modern world dictates rules regarding not only behavior in society, but also communication with the closest people. But are we really surrounded by faces worthy of being called true friends?

Friends are those with whom we share our joys and sorrows, ups and downs. These are those who know a lot about us, but do not tell anyone.

Friends are people who are close to us not because of, but because of friendship. We call comrades those whom we trust and with whom we feel comfortable. These are those who will not quit in difficult times and, in spite of everything, will be there.

Main types

There are several such types, so let's determine which one your friend belongs to.

Look around and see what type your best friend is.

How to identify a real friend?

Best friends are those people who have the following qualities:

Holiday

Friendship was the reason for the creation of an international holiday. Friends Day Serves great occasion remind loved ones of their importance in our lives. Of course, the date is unofficial, and few people know about it, but perhaps the situation will soon change for the better.

Friends Day is celebrated on June 9th. Do not forget to congratulate your close comrades on this day. Even though the festival is unofficial for now, it is an occasion to please each other once again.

Now you know how to distinguish it from the whole mass of friends. Just remember that there are never many friends, or rather, it happens, but whether they are all real is a question. It is very difficult for one to go through life, so it is important that comrades be present in it. They will always support and help you if needed. If you have a person who has all of the above qualities, he is your best friend and communicates with you not for his own benefit. Appreciate it and cherish it.

Hello dear readers of my blog! The topic of friendship is as old as the world. Sometimes we wonder - how to check a friend for friendship? Who will really always be there? A close and dear person nearby can greatly help in difficult situation. How not to lose a true friend and recognize a snake warmed in the heart?

Interrogation with predilection

The first thing you should think about is who do you call a true friend? What is for you. There are people for whom it will be enough just to be sure that you can call at any time. Others are waiting for obedience. Everyone finds people for certain purposes. Why do you need a friend?

How do you distinguish acquaintances, friends, buddies? Is there anything in common between them? What do you value in people? How does an acquaintance become a friend? And then a friend? Or do you immediately find a person who from the first meeting becomes the closest and dearest?

Realizing that there is friendship for you, you appreciate in people, you, and who is just another acquaintance who will not rush after you into a fiery flame.

Deal with this question for yourself, before moving on to any action and checks.

life situations

Before you look for ways to check your friend, think about whether you really need it. Remember that life itself throws up various stories in which people manifest themselves from different sides.

They say a friend in need is a friend. But I can tell you that in addition to trouble, loved ones are tested by happiness. One of my friends was completely ordinary person, worked in an office for eight hours, drove a car on credit, and had a couple of three friends. One fine day, he wrote an application for the phone and after a while he became a fairly wealthy person.

So here are his so-called, to joke with him and express their disdain in every possible way. It all started happening because of their envy. They failed to achieve what my friend came to. And envy of success ruined their friendship.

You don't have to come up with any tests and checks yourself. This can only spoil the relationship with a really good person. This approach shows you, and relationships cannot be good until people trust each other.

Watch your friends in life, if you have suspicions, just wait and fate itself will show you true face your surroundings.

Who am I?

Think about yourself. Start analyzing your own qualities. Would you call yourself a good friend? After all, if you are not such a person, then how can you find loyal and decent people in your environment?

When you yourself can be a friend, ready, listening attentively about the problems of others - then you can safely count on similar attitude and to yourself.

You should stop looking for flaws in your friends. Don't think about what hasn't happened yet. Why don't you trust your friends? Maybe it's really about you? Are you ready to give more than take?

Remember that you attract people to yourself. And the environment that you now have is your doing. Checking today's friend won't help you avoid running into an unholy friend next time.

Remember that trust is very important in friendship. You can only ruin a good relationship with your checks. Be yourself good friend and then you will be surrounded by kind and sincere people. I offer a book to help. About tasty and healthy relationships» which will teach you to surround yourself with good people and tell you how to protect yourself from unhealthy relationships.

Remember that friendship is a mutual process. You yourself have to work hard to achieve a complete understanding with another person. Friendship is not just a fun and enjoyable pastime. This is support, care, respect and much more. Appreciate the people you can call friends.

Friendship is one of the most beautiful forms human relations. People close to you in spirit make your life more interesting, fuller. They will come to the rescue in difficult times or give good advice.

However, among the people whom you consider your friends, there may be persons who are not entirely sincere and honest towards you. Such individuals use others in own purposes. In addition, you yourself may be mistaken about how close your relationship with this or that person is.

To understand the situation, first of all, you need to determine for yourself the very meaning of the word “friendship”. Think about what you expect from people close to you. Pick a few qualities that real friends should have. Try to describe the relationship that exists between friends.

Friend list

Now see if the reality around you matches your idea of ​​friendship. If among your acquaintances there is a person whose portrait fits the description of a friend, analyze your relationship with him.

Remember if this person supported you in a difficult or incomprehensible situation, whether he stood on your side if necessary. Think about how much this individual is interested in you, asking about what is happening in your life.

Figure out if you share your innermost thoughts with your friend, if you share any ideas with each other. People who don't have any common ground at all are unlikely to be friends. So consider if you have common hobbies, interests, tastes, goals or principles.

A true friend

Remember that a true friend will not criticize you just like that. They deliberately try to lower the self-esteem of others and, due to this, only individuals who are negatively disposed towards you assert themselves.

At the same time, a true comrade will frankly answer your question regarding your new hairstyle or clothes. If you are interested in his opinion, be sure: he will not lie. You can rely on such a person. After all, a real friend appreciates truthfulness in a relationship quite highly.

Determine how interesting you are together, how often you see each other. Without maintaining a relationship, people can move away from each other. And then yesterday's friend becomes just an acquaintance.

Consider if there were times when your friend neglected your company for the sake of someone else. Eat separate category people who keeps so-called friends in reserve. And if something more interesting turns up for them, they throw their comrades without a twinge of conscience. Stay away from such manipulators if you don't want to be taken advantage of.

We often write about unnecessary people, about m * ducks and bad girls. Some might say that Brodude is filled with negativity, but that's far from it, man. In fact, we carry a lot of universal inhuman goodness, but it is not always noticeable against the backdrop of brighter articles. Oddly enough, determining that a person is your true friend is sometimes not so easy. Understanding that a person is a m * dak is also not easy, but in fact it is often easy to figure it out. There are not so many real things in life, often we wishful thinking because if you dig a little deeper, it becomes absolutely clear that the so-called "friend" is actually not a friend at all, you just wanted to call some person a friend with nefiga, so as not to seem to himself a sucker without friends. Self-deception, however. Often we do not realize that we are using other people to meet our own needs, calling it romantic or friendships. You can say, “What are the needs? I give about as much to a relationship as I receive!” In this case, it's not a friendly relationship, it's a banal barter. You can also say, “How can you get something in friendly relations? I don't care about money!" In fact, you get communication, which is a valuable resource in human relations. Real friends don't do that. How can you tell if you are a true friend? There are several traits that are found in a true friend. Check not only your friend, but also yourself. Just in case!

Are you okay with your friend's interests or specific traits?

I talked with roleplayers, talked with reenactors, and with anime people, and with geeks, and with nerds, and with many dudes who have many different interests. Thanks to the university, probably, and mutual friends who introduced me to everyone. Therefore, I personally have a tolerant attitude towards almost any interests. But, according to my personal observations, not all people are distinguished by a calm attitude to unusual hobbies.

Even if you absolutely do not understand what your friend finds in " star wars”, “Chinese porn cartoons”, computer games and reading comics, you won't bully him just because you think it's weird, stupid and unworthy of a normal bro. All that a true friend can say is that he cannot understand this and cannot talk about it. If you scoff at what you think are dubious interests of your comrade and in every possible way force him to change his point of view and interest, you can hardly be called a friend. Most likely, you are a kind of manipulator of other people's consciousness, who wants to have a number of people who can be controlled. Seriously, what's wrong with other people's hobbies if you want them not to do it? Of course, if they do not go to people's homes with sermons and talk about God.

Are you ready for a serious conversation with him?

If your friends are doing something wrong with their lives, you are ready to have a serious talk with them, set a number of conditions, and even kick them in the face a couple of times. educational purposes. But this only applies to those issues when your friend really does something very bad with his life: he cheats on a good girl, drinks, suffers from clouding his mind, got into some kind of sect or uses dope. The willingness to talk seriously with your friend and do everything to get him out of this state is what a real friend should do. Another question is whether you will succeed or not!

But this only applies to serious things, really serious things.

Try to accept your friend for who he is.

Your bro can be a lazy person, a drinker, a kind of hippie, or an active civic activist. The main thing is that he a good man, a friend, and not the one usually called . Seriously, what's the worst thing your friend can do to make you stop talking to him? This usually has negative attitude to you, for example, to sleep with your girlfriend.

All shortcomings, if they do not lead to the destruction of his nature, may well deserve the right to life. Who are we without flaws, after all? For some reason, I immediately remember the film "Rock and Roll", in which one of the main characters found out that his old sidekick was gay and in love with him. Frankly, I do not know how I would behave in this situation. Perhaps with a wild cry would have swept through main street of his city, and, perhaps, he would say to the dude: “Well, okay, dude! It's not my thing, you know!" Of course, there's a chance the attention would flatter me, but it's still embarrassing. But the dude from the movie was still able to relate to this news normally. I wonder if there could be friendship after that? Or is it like friendship between a man and a woman?

With regard to him, you can readily admit that you were once wrong.

Even if you usually have a hard time with it. In the end, you realize that you did a bad thing and tell your friend that you are wrong. Usually a real friend does this, by such behavior you can judge how dear you are to this or that person. It's like a willingness to compromise in a relationship with a girl, this lack of selfish aspirations towards another person, which always says that you are in awe of friendship with this dude and seriously do not want to lose him. It sounds absolutely sentimental, but it's hard to say otherwise.

Of course, this does not mean that you will burst into tears like a girl, throw it in your arms to your friend and exclaim: “Sorry, man! I'll be a bastard - I won't forget! Usually this means quite restrained (but sincere): “Dude, I got excited and was wrong!”. If your bro or you admit your guilt, maybe you really know how to be friends.